Tag Archive for: intuitive eating

3 Tips for Eat Mindfully While Eating Out

A question I often hear from my intuitive eating clients is “how do I stay tuned into my hunger and fullness signals when I am eating out with friends?”

 

This is a common challenge, if you experience this too, just know you are not alone.

 

Eating out in restaurants bring all types of challenges for the intuitive eater in training. First, there’s the noise level in the restaurant. While there are many restaurants who have a quiet ambiance, there are even more that have a lot of noise from families with kids, televisions showing sports games, and even just the waiters and bus boys hustling around.

 

In addition to the noise level that can distract you from paying attention to your eating, there’s just the excitement of being out with friends, catching up on conversation, celebrating a birthday or other milestone, and trying new foods!

 

So, how do you stay tuned in while eating out?

 

Here’s 3 tips to get you started!

 

  1. Set an intention: Before you leave the house, set an intention of how you will stay present during the meal. Write this intention on a piece of paper or index card, read it out loud so you hear your voice, and put it in your purse. Just setting the intention will bring it into your conscious mind.

 

  1. Pause mid-meal: Take a break from eating at some point in the middle of your meal. Put the fork down and consciously ask yourself “how satisfied am I feeling at this point”. This does not mean you cannot pick up the fork and continue eating, it’s just a way to check-in with yourself.

 

  1. Maintain awareness: Stay fully present during the meal and maintain an awareness of your surroundings. Take some time to look around, notice the décor, the other diners, and breathe. The breathing will bring you into a state of “rest and digest” which will help you maintain awareness throughout your eating. This requires practice, so it’s best to practice this every day when you eat at home, it’ll then be easier when you are out.

 

Eating out is fun! There’s no reason to walk out of a restaurant holding your stomach and saying “Oh, I’m so full”. This takes away from the pleasant experience of socializing with good friends and eating good food.

 

Use these tips the next time you eat out and let me know below how it’s worked for you!

 

Want more tips? Follow me on Facebook and Instagram!

 

Still stuck in the diet cycle? Break the Spell of Diets in 3 Days by entering your name and email in the boxes below!

Intuitive Eating is Your Birthright – 5 Day Special

When’s the last time you watched a newborn baby feed? I mean a real newborn, like just a few hours old.

 

I did, on Monday evening, when I went to visit my daughter-in-law and newborn granddaughter! I could have just stared for hours at this little princess; she is just so adorable. But as I was staring at her, I noticed something very interesting. She started puckering up her mouth and moving it side-to-side, her way of telling her mom that she was hungry!

 

Did you ever stop to think about this?

 

Babies cannot speak, their way of communicating is non-verbal, and they get their message across loud and clear. That message of hunger is coming from within, they were born with the ability to know when they are hungry and when they are satisfied enough to pull away from breast or bottle.

 

You were born this way too! You may not remember back to those early newborn days, but you were. We are all born intuitive eaters.

 

So, what happened over the years that caused you to stop being guided by this innate ability of eating intuition?

 

While there are several reasons, the biggest one I feel is you falling prey to the billion-dollar diet industry and your desire to lose weight.

 

When you start listening to food rules and guidelines from external sources (meaning outside of your own body), you are basically telling your body that you don’t trust the messages it is giving you.

 

This is not your fault. The diet industry and those health coaches promoting diets are at fault. But you can do something about it today. You can stand up and say NO MORE DIETS! You can tell yourself that you CAN learn to TRUST in your own body again.

 

Because I am telling you, YOU CAN!

 

Getting back to becoming an intuitive eater is a journey of discovery and growth. There is no start and end point. It will become a daily practice that is second nature again, just as you were born.

 

Maybe you are already on your intuitive eating journey. That’s great!! Practice and support will continue to guide you to coming home to your body.

 

In honor of my new granddaughter, I have a SPECIAL OFFER for you!

 

For You – If You’ve Had Previous Intuitive Eating Training:

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Join the INTUITIVE EATING MASTERY CIRCLE for 50% off. Read all the details HERE and join an amazing group of women who are on the journey towards living life to the fullest!

 

For you – If You’re Just Starting Your Intuitive Eating Journey:

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Not sure which program is right for you? Email me and let’s get on the phone and figure it out together.

Food Overwhelm (and 3 Strategies to Deal with It)

It’s holiday week. Whether you celebrated Easter this past weekend, or you are still celebrating Passover this week, holiday eating can sometimes pose a problem for those working on giving up dieting to embrace intuitive eating.

 

The goal is to have a more peaceful relationship with food, and to learn to trust that your body knows just what it needs and wants.

 

Yet, with the abundance of foods over the holidays, peace with food might be far from what you are experiencing.

 

Let’s look at 3 obstacles that might come up for you. And, of course, strategies to overcome!

 

1) Food Overwhelm: There is no lack for food, no matter the holiday. But with Passover celebrated for 8 days, I hear from many of my clients that they don’t leave the kitchen. They are forever cooking and serving, and it seems like the family is more hungry than usual during this holiday. The meals have 5 courses to them, and there is no “white space” on the table.

 

Strategy: Review your menus and decide if you really need 5 courses. Most likely you don’t. Most people are satisfied after the second course but continue to eat because more food is served.

 

I did just this this last holiday weekend, and by the end of the meal, my family felt comfortable, satiated and happy. They were able to experience pleasure in the meal because they didn’t walk away from the table overfull.

 

2) Once a Year Favorites: When a certain holiday only comes around once per year, it can pose an inner conflict for you when it comes to foods. With the annual holiday, comes special foods that you usually only eat during this time. The thought of “I can only eat this now, and then I have to wait a full year to eat it again” can instill a mindset of “I better get it all in now.” The future deprivation causes overeating.

 

Strategy: Consider whether these special holiday foods that only come around once per year really have to only be eaten once per year, on this holiday. For example, one of my kids favorite foods during Passover is Cottage Cheese Pancakes. They look forward to it every year and they make sure that it’ll be on my Passover menu at some point throughout the 8 days. I realized one day, “why do I only make these cottage cheese pancakes on Passover? I can surely make them all year round.” And that’s what I did. Don’t get me wrong, they are still something my kids look forward to on Passover, but they don’t have to go overboard on them since they know they can eat them any time of the year.

 

However, I do realize that there are traditional holiday foods that only show up once a year. In this case, the best thing to do is to acknowledge the fact that you will only get to eat this now, but also realize that if you eat slowly and savor every bite, you will no doubt have more pleasure in this special food than if you eat it quickly without really tasting it (which is what happens when you try to get it all in now!)

 

3) Pushy Family Members: We all have them! Those family members that push you to eat more food even after you’ve said you’re full. Or, family members who give you looks when you take more food on your plate (you know, those judge-y people) . This can be very challenging, especially if mixed messages are flying around such as “eat more”, and “the diet starts tomorrow”.

 

Strategy: Do not feel obligated to eat after you’ve decided you are comfortably full. Tell your host that you enjoyed the meal but just cannot eat another bite. For those that appear to judge you when you take food, stand up for yourself and ask them to keep their eyes in their own plate (you can say this more diplomatically if you’d like, but I’ve said it just like this and man, did it shut them up!).

 

As for the endless diet talk, excuse yourself to go to the restroom and remind yourself that you have given up dieting. Have compassion for those folks who are still swimming in diet culture and give yourself a hug that you are staying true to yourself. Then go back to the table and change the topic (“what movie have you seen lately”, works great!).

 

As you continue on your intuitive eating journey, you will see that these obstacles aren’t obstacles any longer. These are opportunities for learning and growth. You’ve got this!

 

Need help on your intuitive eating journey? Just head on over to www.TalkWithBonnie.com and schedule a chat with me.

 

How to NOT Eat Your Frustration

Frustration. That is the emotion that I’ve been feeling this week. Here’s why:

 

The Set-Up

I decided to change the hosting of all my websites and domains that I use to run my business. I chose a very large hosting company and was feeling confident that all would go smoothly, at least that’s what they promised. However, after 1 ½ months of back and forth phone calls, the migration of my websites was still not complete. I asked for a refund and went on the search for another hosting company.

 

I found another company who seemed eager to help me. I signed up with them and followed their directions to migrate my sites. After many back and forth phone calls, we were getting somewhere. However, I’ve come to learn that there is always going to be a glitch. And, what’s important is how I handle that glitch.

 

Among the many glitches was that a client was not able to access her training modules for a few hours. Okay, not so terrible, I actually figured out how to fix that myself (pat on my back!). But for the few minutes, I was terribly frustrated.

 

Now that all the sites are transferred over successfully, it was time to migrate my Outlook email. This proved to be more difficult. I’m the first to admit that computer and tech language for me is a foreign language. You might as well be speaking to me in Greek, Chinese, or any language other than English. I don’t get it.

 

So, at the time I’m writing this blog post, I have been without email for 36 hours and counting. This means that if you’ve tried to email me, I likely didn’t get it. So, please email me again!

 

(Note – if you are reading this blog in your email, it’s because you received it through iContact, my email management system, which is totally separate from my Outlook email – am I confusing you now??)

 

What’s my point of sharing this all with you?

 

Coping with Frustration

Just a few years ago when I felt frustrated, I would let it get the best of me. Perhaps I’d have a pity party, you know, the ones that include ice cream.

 

But today, things are different.

 

I reframe what is going on. I put things in perspective. I think to myself “how does this affect the real important things in my life, such as my husband and kids, my parents, my health and their health”?

 

Throughout this pause, I breath deeply. This breath work takes me from stress mode (fight or flight) into calming rest mode! And, it helps me process and make the best decisions to take care of myself in the frustrating situation I find myself in.

 

There is no ice cream. There is no chocolate. There is no pity party.

 

There is nothing wrong with ice cream or chocolate. But in a moment of frustration, that’s not what I need to take the best care of ME.

 

Your Turn

How do you handle frustration? Or any emotion for that matter? Comment below!

 

And, if you want to learn strategies to stress less and eat less, then check this SPECIAL out that I have for you, only during the month of April, which is Stress Awareness Month.

 

When Diet Culture Steals Your Logical Thinking

This is a painful blog for me to write. It shows just how much diet culture and striving for the thin ideal overtakes one’s logical thinking brain.

 

Here’s the story…

 

I’m treating a client for a gastrointestinal disorder. Due to the nature of her condition and her intolerance to many foods, she shared with me that she lost weight. How does she know? Her clothes are big on her. And, yes, she weighs herself regularly.

 

She went to her internist this week to discuss her varying medical issues she is currently dealing with. The doctor weighed her and told her she lost X pounds in the last 3 months. I’m not revealing the number of pounds she lost, the number isn’t relevant. What IS relevant is that it’s a significant weight change in a short period of time, coupled with a review of her labs which reveal that she is malnourished.

 

My client’s reaction?

 

I’m happy I lost weight, I like how I look and I’m getting compliments.

 

This is where I cringed. Here is a bright woman who for the last 50 years has been chasing weight loss only to regain what she’s lost (no news here!). Now that she’s losing weight, she is thrilled, but what she fails to comprehend is that this weight loss is DETRIMENTAL to her health.

 

Her body is not absorbing the nutrients from the foods she is eating. She is malnourished. Yet, she says she “wouldn’t mind losing a little more”.

 

Diet culture has messed with people’s intelligence. The society we live in today worships thinness so much so that people are willing to go to any lengths to lose weight and claim a higher status that diet culture promises.

 

If you’ve fallen prey to this unfortunate outcome of living in a diet-obsessed culture, here’s 3 steps you can do right now to turn this around:

 

Step 1: Be honest with yourself: Take a long hard look at how you are treating your body. Are you dieting and wishfully dreaming for that thin body? And if so, to what extent and detriment to get there? What harm are you already experiencing physically and emotionally?

 

Step 2: Commit to stop dieting: This might be very scary if you’ve allowed diets to “control” your eating for a long time. But you must commit to never diet again, otherwise you will always be tempted by another diet that pops up (and there will be many!).

 

Step 3: Seek support: If diet culture and the pursuit of thinness has prevented you from making logical decisions about your health and well-being, please reach out for support. You need help from a qualified health professional to help you turn this around. It is possible! And, it shows strength to reach out for support.

 

I’m happy to report that my client is now doing well. She has given up the notion that her body needs to look a certain way and she has started to appreciate her body shape and capabilities. She is slowly re-nourishing her body and healing from her gut disorder. And, her logical thinking has returned.

 

What about you? How has diet culture and striving for the thin idea affected your logical thinking? Let me know below! And, as always, if you want to chat, just contact me.

 

woman plate food

3 Reasons Why You Don’t Stop Eating (and What to Do About it)

You’ve decided to give up dieting (yay!) and you’ve been working on making peace with food. You’re doing a great job at giving yourself unconditional permission to eat and you are truly enjoying your meals.

 

All this sounds amazing, but you are facing a dilemma. You’re enjoying your meals so much that you don’t want to stop when you recognize fullness, you want to keep eating. This is causing you to doubt your ability to become an intuitive eater.

 

First, let me assure you that this is a “normal” part of the process. Be gentle with yourself as you reacquaint yourself with your body and the foods you haven’t eaten for a long time.

 

Here are 3 reasons why you don’t want to stop eating, and what you can do about it:

 

  1. You haven’t truly given yourself unconditional permission to eat that food. Here’s the thing…if you don’t really believe that you can eat this food again whenever you want it, it will be more difficult to stop when you recognize fullness.

What to do: work on giving yourself emotional/mental permission to eat this food in addition to the physical permission.

 

  1. You are checked-out during mealtime. If you are eating with distraction (phone, newspaper, T.V etc.), you are not fully paying attention to your meal and are missing the signals of comfortable fullness. Now, suddenly you are overfull.

 

What to do: Put away all distractions. I know it’s challenging to sit and just eat, especially if you’re so used to multi-tasking through your meal. But you deserve better than that, and so does your body.

 

  1. You are eating to numb your feelings. If you are used to coping with difficult emotions by turning to food, then consider whether you are trying to stuff down those emotions, so you don’t have to feel them.

What to do: Pause and ask yourself “am I still hungry?”. If your honest answer is no, then ask yourself what you are truly feeling and what do you need to help manage those feelings without food.

 

Your intuitive eating journey is not a linear path, it is a process that has twists and turns.

 

Each twist and turn is a learning experience for you. Remember to be kind and gentle to yourself as you relearn how to trust yourself, your body and your food choices. You’ve got this!

 

Can I help in any way? If so, just email me at Bonnie@DietFreeRadiantMe.com.

Pushing through Intuitive Eating Resistance

Something I’ve heard several times from potential clients is “I’ve tried intuitive eating already and it didn’t work”. And so, the search for the next diet continues.

 

I get it. With all the messages swirling around you about the body you “should” have, the weight you “should” lose for your “health” and the false promises that once you lose the weight your life will be all sunshine and rainbows, it’s no surprise that when you “tried” intuitive eating before, you treated it like yet another diet.

 

It’s not your fault! If you’ve been dieting for years or even decades, your mindset around food and your body is that of a dieter. You are battling food at every meal and have come to have a love-hate relationship with food.

 

The Reason for the Resistance

Intuitive eating is not a weight loss method. If you’ve tried intuitive eating with the hope that you would lose weight, then more than likely that’s why you were disappointed.

 

Intuitive eating is a practice of listening to your own body signals when making decisions around food, rather than listening to external sources telling you what, when and how much to eat.

 

When beginning your intuitive eating journey, it’s most important to shelve the desire for weight loss. Now I’m not saying to forget about this desire, just acknowledge it’s there but you aren’t acting on it right now. In this way, you are paving the way to changing your relationship with food without a hidden weight loss agenda.

 

Bottom Line

If you’ve “tried” intuitive eating but still secretly hoped you would lose weight, then you didn’t “try” intuitive eating.

 

This small tweak can make all the difference.

 

Ready to give it a go? Just head on over to www.TalkWithBonnie.com and request a complementary phone call.

 

 

 

 

 

What’s for Dinner?

How do you decide what to eat for dinner (or any meal)?

 

It seems like a simple question, but for the chronic dieter who has lost all trust in their body and ability to make food decisions, this is actually a very difficult question that is faced with anguish.

 

There’s the food that you think you “should” eat, and the food that you really want to eat. You have 2 voices in your head. Voice #1 – “Eat this, you know you should, it’s what your diet prescribes, it’ll help you lose weight”. Voice #2 – “No, choose this because you know it’s really what you want. You haven’t eaten this in ages.”

 

Either decision you make creates a negative feeling around food. If you follow voice #1 and eat what the diet tells you to eat, you have minimal to zero satisfaction when you are done. The entire time you are eating, you are thinking about the pizza you could have been eating. Your belly may be full, but your mind is not satisfied. You now look around the kitchen, open all the cabinets for something just to “finish off the meal”. You are searching for something to fill your psychological void. You are not happy.

 

However, if you follow voice #2 and eat the pizza, you fall into the diet mentality trap of “I messed up, I shouldn’t have eaten the pizza. Okay, I’ll just have one more piece and I promise I won’t eat it again for a long time.” You end up eating several slices, feel physically uncomfortable and emotionally guilty, full of shame, disappointment in yourself and disgust. You did it again. In the end, you didn’t derive the satisfaction you were looking for because the physical and emotional distress took over.

 

What’s the answer to this dilemma?

 

Pausing long enough to remind yourself that you are learning to give yourself unconditional permission to eat when you are hungry. This means all foods are available to you. Once you take the “should’s” and “shouldn’ts” off your food, you will realize that you can eat the foods you love without the worry of overeating.

 

This takes time, especially if you’ve been dieting for decades. But you have to start somewhere, so why not start today, with this very meal.

 

What is one food or meal that you would LOVE to eat for dinner tonight but would never dream of allowing yourself to have?

 

Go out and buy that food or make it for yourself for dinner tonight. Sit down without distraction and savor every bite knowing that eating this food now does not mean you could never eat it again. It means that you could eat it now, later, tomorrow, next week…whenever you want it. Just knowing this will help you stop when you are comfortably full.

 

Stuffed Potato Skins, Spinach Parmesan Lasagna, Pita Pizza, Fettuccini with Vegetables, Peanut Butter Bran Muffins, Double Chocolate Chews, Cinnamon Coffee Cake…

these are just a few of the recipes in my new book: Enjoying Food Peace: Recipes and Intuitive Eating Wisdom to Nourish Your Body and Mind.

 

Start to eat what you love without a side of guilt!

Enjoying Food Peace Book

Get your copy today on AMAZON!

 

Or, get a SIGNED COPY directly from me HERE!

Why I Wrote My Book, Enjoying Food Peace (Coming Soon)

For years I’ve been helping clients and patients make the changes necessary to live a healthier life. I’ve enjoyed every minute of it, it’s an amazing feeling to hear from a client how I’ve impacted them in a positive way.

 

Yes, I make a difference and I help people. Man, this feels good.

 

But one day it occurred to me. While many of my clients were making lifelong changes, there was a group of individuals who were struggling. After digging deeper, I realized why.

 

These wonderful and caring individuals were not at peace with food or their bodies. They were striving to live up to society’s standards of the “thin ideal” and would do anything to achieve this unreasonable goal, all the while being miserable. They were eating foods that they thought they should eat, and not foods they loved. And, if they ate something they loved, they often felt guilty afterwards telling themselves “now I’m going to gain weight.”

 

If you’re here reading my blog, I imagine you resonate with what I’m talking about. Food is not something to be feared, food is to be enjoyed. Yet, too many people in this world are brainwashed to believe that there are “good-for-you” foods and “bad-for-you” foods and it wreaks havoc on their lives.

 

Labeling Food

Good/bad, healthy/unhealthy, legal/illegal etc. It doesn’t matter what label you give food, just the fact that you put a label on a food is elevating some foods and demonizing others.

 

Of course, there are some foods that are more nutrient-rich than others, I don’t argue that. But there is a purpose for all foods. Some foods fuel you and some foods give you great taste pleasure. And there’s nothing wrong with that.

 

Making Peace with Food

I’ve been in private practice for over 30 years! I’ve seen a lot of people lose weight and regain that weight plus more through some form of dieting. It was time for them to stop relying on what others told them to eat and start to eat what they truly wanted.

 

So, for the last 8 years I’ve helped chronic dieters and emotional eaters make peace with food through my Intuitive Eating Program. Once the food fear was gone, they were able to enjoy all types of foods made in all types of ways from all types of cuisine. They truly recaptured the pleasures of eating.

 

Enjoying Food Peace Was Born

I wanted this peace for people all over the world that were struggling with their food. So, I decided to write a cookbook called, Enjoying Food Peace: Recipes and Intuitive Eating Wisdom to Nourish Your Body and Mind.

 

Get a sneak peek here!

 

This book is not just for chronic dieters looking for food peace. It’s also for people who are obsessed with “eating healthy” to the point where they have cut out major food groups or nutrients and have just a small selection of foods they feel safe eating. It’s a segue back to balanced eating.

 

Enjoying Food Peace is also for everyone who enjoys a good meal.

 

It’s taken me 6 years to write this book! I put together an amazing team of nutrition interns who helped test the recipes. We met every Tuesday in my test kitchen to taste the foods that were prepared that week. Then we would evaluate and critique. “It needs a little more of that, a little less of this, ah, it’s perfect!”

 

The Wisdoms

After completing the recipes and putting together the book, I felt I wanted to add more. One night it came to me…write a chapter introducing intuitive eating and share some “Intuitive Eating Wisdoms” throughout the book. So, that’s exactly what I did! Not only will the recipes nourish your body, but the wisdoms will nourish your mind.

 

The creative genius and photographer behind the design of the book and the color photos you’ll see inside is my amazing assistant Samantha Baturin. This book would not be coming to life if it wasn’t for Samantha! I am forever grateful to her!!

 

Enjoying Food Peace provides the reader with over 150 tasty recipes and Intuitive Eating Wisdom to eat what you love, without a side of guilt.

 

I hope you’re as excited as I am for March 20th launch day! Keep your eyes peeled so you can get your copy!

 

In the meantime, here’s a sneak peek at what’s inside Enjoying Food Peace (free recipe included!).

 

 

Results Not Typical

It’s easy to be influenced by pictures we see or advertisements we read. There is no shortage of ads for weight loss products, pills, drinks, diets etc. Each of these are accompanied by a before and after picture. The before picture of the woman (or man) is usually her standing slouched over with a solemn look on her face. And then the after picture, standing with the best posture and a big smile. Many times, the person in the after picture is even holding up a large article of clothing to show the size they used to wear.

 

The advertisement is telling you that if you use said product, you can lose weight too, just like the person in the picture. It gets you all hyped up to think “If she can do this, so could I”. THIS is the solution (a.k.a. miracle) I’ve been waiting for!

The Problem

You may wonder what’s the problem with being encouraged by someone else’s weight loss results who used the advertised product?

 

The first problem (among many) is that all people are different. You don’t know what her medical history is or her dieting history. You don’t know what medications she’s taking that possibly affect her appetite or her weight. You don’t know anything about her except that she took this product and lost weight.

 

The second product is you know nothing about the ingredients in this product. Many times, you can’t even pronounce them. Will they interact with your meds? Are they approved ingredients? Is this product contraindicated with your conditions? Oh, there are so many unknowns here.

 

The Deceit

Did you ever look at the fine print in the advertisements? If not, take a look. It reads something along the lines of:

  • Results not typical
  • As part of a balanced diet and healthy lifestyle
  • All subjects followed a calorie-reduced diet and walking program
  • Price does not include cost of grocery items

 

Yes, you read that correctly. The models in the advertisements who used the product were also dieting, cutting calories and exercising. Yet, the ad doesn’t lead you to believe that. It makes you think that you just need to pop this pill (“supplement”) three times per day and voila!

 

And, the results you are seeing are not typical of most average people. The advertisers are saying it right there to you. But if you don’t read the fine print, you miss it. You think it’s the product that brought these results that you too desire so much.

 

Bottom Line

Don’t believe everything you see or read. And, do your due diligence, read the fine print. Don’t get suckered into another diet or gimmick. More than 95% of people who lose weight on a diet regain that weight within 2-5 years. Do you want to be included in that statistic?

 

The #1 Thing You Need to Do

Give up dieting. Commit to never diet again. But don’t stop there. Believe that you CAN change the way you relate to food and your body. Your mind is a powerful thing. It all starts with ONE BELIEF!

 

Not sure about intuitive eating?

Let’s take it one step at a time. First step is to break the spell that diets have over you. Add your name and email in the boxes below and join me over the next 3 days to learn how to break this spell.