I’m Eating Unconditionally but Going Overboard on Sweets. Help!

This week’s Intuitive Eating Wednesday Question comes from a woman in my Diet Free Radiant Me intuitive eating support community.

The question is:

Question:

“When I give myself unconditional permission to eat the foods I want, all I eat are carbs and sweets, and I eat too many of them!! I’m worried that if I eat intuitively, I will only eat carbs and I will gain weight.”

 

I understand this concern, because I hear it from many people, both clients who are just starting the intuitive eating journey and those in my private intuitive eating support group who are contemplating the journey (If you are not yet a part of our group, join HERE for free).

 

It makes sense. You’ve been restricting carbs and sweets for years, maybe even decades (except when you are bingeing). Your mind has been programmed to think that carbs and sweets are “bad” for you and that you are a “bad” person if you eat them. So, in an effort to be “good”, you restrict them to the best of your ability. Until you can’t resist any longer and you make a deal with yourself – “I’ll only have one”, which leads to many or the whole box. Then you promise to NEVER eat them again.

 

So when the idea of intuitive eating was presented to you with the concept of “give yourself unconditional permission to eat what you desire when you are hungry”, this sounded too good to be true. But who are you to argue. You jump right in. And now you find yourself all the way at the other extreme of ‘carb land’ eating and eating and eating with a fear that you will now gain weight.

 

There are 3 points I’d like to make here to help you be at peace with ‘unconditional permission to eat”.

1. Whenever you restrict something all the way in one direction (i.e. chocolate) and then you release that restriction, it is going to boomerang all the way to the other direction. This means if you’ve restricted chocolate or pizza and haven’t had it in years, and now you release that restriction and allow yourself to eat it, you are likely going to eat a lot of it because you haven’t had it in so long. It’s like a pendulum, when pulled in one direction and then you let it go, it swings all the way to the opposite end.

 

Or, like a seesaw (did you play on a seesaw when you were a kid? I did!). Visualize restriction and deprivation at the highest point (that’s you sitting on the seesaw up in the air!). Then you let the restriction go all at once, bam, the seesaw hits the ground (and your bottom took a big hit!)

 

This is absolutely ‘normal’. This won’t last forever. You will return to a middle ground after a while. At some point you will say to yourself “okay, tastes nice but I don’t feel the need to have it every day anymore. I can have it any time I desire.”

 

2. Part of becoming attuned to your inner body wisdom means being mindful of how you feel while eating and after eating certain foods. So pay attention to how you feel when you are eating an overabundance of sweets. Do you feel energized, sluggish, low energy, tired? Do you have indigestion, bloat etc. You will find that after a while your body will tell you what it wants, and often that is lighter foods because it makes you feel so much better.

 

3. When you allow all foods into your world again, you will begin to identify your true food preferences. You may think you cannot live without those chocolate kisses, but now that you aren’t restricting them, you find that they taste like cheap chocolate. If you are going to eat chocolate, you want the expensive Godiva chocolate (I have a story about this which I’ll save for another time!)

 

This all might sound logical to you, right? So, why are you still scared?

 

Here are several reasons, along with solutions.

 

The solutions include the freebie gift downloads I’ve created for you over the last 3 weeks of Intuitive Eating Wednesdays.

 

1. Intellectually you understand all this. But your inner voices are still shouting diet food rules at you. This is because you still possess a diet mentality and wonder if willpower will help you eat the sweets ‘in moderation’.

 

Solution: There is no willpower required in intuitive eating. Download Your 3 Step Plan to Shift Out of Diet Mentality and the Willpower Trap here.

 

2. It’s not about the food at all. It’s about the WHY you are eating.

 

Solution: Learn what emotions are driving your eating and download the Emotional Eating Inventory Worksheet here.

 

3. You are still labeling food as “good” and “bad”, “healthy” and “unhealthy”.

 

Solution: Reprogram your ‘good food/bad food’ mindset and download the Fleshing Out Your ‘Good Foods/Bad Foods’ Worksheet here.

 

Let’s discuss this further on today’s Facebook LIVE at 5:30 pm EST on my Facebook business page HERE. Go ahead and LIKE the page now so you get notification when I go live.

 

Want to talk? Just go to http://TalkWithBonnie.com, answer a few short questions and we will set up a time to chat.

 

 

 

 

How to Stop Labeling Food as Good and Bad

This week’s Intuitive Eating Wednesday Question and Struggle comes from 2 women in my Diet Free Radiant Me private Facebook group:

Question:

I know choosing certain foods makes me feel healthy and vibrant. I also know there are certain foods that make me feel the opposite, drain my energy and leave me feeling sluggish. How do I approach health in this way without viewing food as good and bad?

Struggle:

Bonnie, I can’t appreciate the body I have now because it isn’t healthy. I know losing the extra fat will help those issues. But I can’t stop labeling food as healthy or unhealthy. I keep reading not to label foods but we all know broccoli is healthier for you than a Hershey bar. I feel like the extra fat will not go away along with all the health problems until I start feeding myself healthier foods, which feels like a diet. I try to eat mostly healthy but it seems once I eat the unhealthier foods that’s all I crave because they do taste better to me. Help!

 

Both the question and struggle you have just read above have something in common, which is why I am addressing both in the same blog today on Intuitive Eating Wednesday.

The commonality is…

 

Food is being labeled. In the first question it’s being classified as “good and bad”, and in the second struggle it’s being labeled “healthy and unhealthy”. This is due to your years of dieting and following rules of foods to eat and those to avoid. The foods to eat are ‘good/healthy for you foods’, meaning they will help you lose weight (or at least not gain weight) and be healthy. The foods to avoid/are unhealthy are ‘bad for you’ foods, meaning they will cause you to gain weight and be unhealthy.

 

As long as you continue to think of food in these terms, you continue to harbor a diet mindset. And as long as you continue to harbor a diet mindset, you will continue to struggle.

 

Download Your Fleshing Our Your ‘Good Foods/Bad Foods’ Worksheet here.

 

Even though intellectually you know you feel more vibrant when you eat food A over food B, if you associate food A as a good/healthy food and food B as a bad/unhealthy food, you will continue to crave food B, depriving yourself of it until you have an emotional trigger and you fall into the “what the heck” mode. You then overeat food B, perhaps even to the point of bingeing, followed by guilt, shame, and hopelessness.

 

It IS possible to shift your mindset away from labeling foods and out of a dieter’s mindset. However, this must be done without consideration of the nutritional value of the foods otherwise you are still thinking in terms of good/bad, healthy/unhealthy which will keep you stuck in the diet food rule trap.

 

This is the very reason that I don’t teach nutrition to my intuitive eating clients until Step 5 of my 5 Step Intuitive Eating Program. If we start the process of learning how to nourish your body, yet you have a diet mentality, all the nutrition conversation we have about foods that make you feel healthy and vibrant is heard by you as more diet rules (good/bad, healthy/unhealthy).

 

Make sense?

 

Let’s discuss this further on today’s Facebook LIVE at 5:30 pm EST (note the time change!)

 

In the meantime, grab this freebie to help you understand your good food/bad food mindset: Fleshing Our Your ‘Good Foods/Bad Foods’ Worksheet.

 

 

I Feel Full But I Still Want to Eat More

This week’s Intuitive Eating Wednesday Question is:

 

“How do I stop eating when I know I’m full? I just want to keep eating what’s on my plate until it’s finished. And I do, and then I feel bad, guilty and ashamed that I’ve done it again!”

 

Do you ever have this conversation in your head?

 

I hear this question a lot from my clients, which is why I want to address it with you.

 

As a dieter, you are used to eating on autopilot, and finishing what’s on your plate or in the bag. Part of the journey I take my clients on is learning how to move out of autopilot eating……ahhhh, not always so easy, is it?

 

If you are eating a meal and you know you are full, but you are just loving the food you are eating and don’t want to stop, it may very well be you testing the intuitive eating process. You just don’t fully believe you could actually give yourself permission to eat what you love. If you did, then you’d know that you can put this food away and have it at another time.

This is often tied to emotions.

 

Download your Emotional Eating Inventory Worksheet here.

 

You are feeding an emotional hunger when you continue to eat even after you have recognized you are full. It’s not WHAT you are eating, it’s WHY you are continuing to eat.

 

So the first step is learning the difference between physical hunger and emotional hunger. This is key. And understanding what emotions you are feeding is the second step that will help you take action to stop.

 

To break the pattern around emotional eating, you need to increase your awareness around this pattern. You then give yourself the choice to respond differently and to find another way to meet your emotional needs without food.

 

Grab this freebie to help you take stock of your emotional eating: Emotional Eating Inventory Worksheet.

 

 

Intuitive Eating…No Willpower Required

This week’s Intuitive Eating Wednesday’s Question is:

“I’ve been trying intuitive eating, but I just don’t have the willpower to stick with it. How can I strengthen my willpower backbone?”

 

I just LOVE this question. But before I get to the answer, let’s get clear on your dieting history. It probably goes something like this:

 

You’ve tried them all. Weight Watchers, Atkins, Weight Watchers, the Blood Type Diet, Weight Watchers. the Scarsdale Diet, Weight Watchers, the HCG Diet, Weight Watchers. Oh, did I mention Weight Watchers?!

 

It is SO easy to get sucked into sensational claims that come with each of these diets. But what you are finding is that they don’t work. Well, they do “work” if by working you mean losing weight, only to gain it back.

 

Yes, I won’t disagree. All diets can work in helping you lose weight. But can we agree that they ultimately don’t work, seeing you are here looking for another way?

 

Throughout all the diets you’ve been on, you’ve tried SO hard to have SO much willpower so you can resist your favorite food that the diets deem bad for you. And, the reason you’ve been sucked into many fad diets is because you only have to endure them for a short period of time and therefore only need to have a little willpower until the diet is over.  

 

Many diets proudly state “Lose 30 pounds in 30 days”, or “6 weeks to flat abs”. I know this is very tempting. And you think to yourself “ok, I need to have willpower for 30 days (or 6 weeks) and that’s it…I’ll reach my goal and the diet and misery will be over.”

 

But we know that you can only resist your favorite food for so long. Maybe you can last the 30 days or 6 weeks. Or maybe you can’t. Either way, what happens? When your willpower weakens and you have an emotional trigger, you cave and have the very food you’ve been longing yet been restricting. And now you don’t just have a serving, you have several servings, and it eventually turns into a binge.

 

Next thing that happens >>> feelings of guilt, shame, hopelessness, failure and the negative self-talk and body bashing.

 

Well, the good news is this.

 

In the practice of intuitive eating, there is no willpower required. Yay! You learn to take all the conditions off your food and when you do, the power those foods hold over you are no more. Even better, once you learn to trust in your inner signals as your guide to eating, you will no longer need to rebel against the diets that are telling you what to eat and not to eat.

 

Because YOU are in charge!

So, back to the original question that came in from one of my readers:

 

“I’ve been trying intuitive eating, but I just don’t have the willpower to stick with it. How can I strengthen my willpower backbone?”

 

There is no willpower in intuitive eating. What I want you to recognize is if you are still relying on willpower, then you are still harboring a diet mentality. And this will cause you to continue to stumble on your intuitive eating journey.

 

Give thought to how many times a day or week you think to yourself that you need to have willpower to resist a food.

 

How many times do you call up your willpower before heading out to a party or dinner with friends?

 

Call yourself out on it. Recognize it. The more you do and the more you remind yourself that you don’t need willpower in intuitive eating, the more you will see the diet mentality dissipate.

 

Grab this freebie that I have for you and you’ll be well on your way to never falling into the willpower trap again: Your 3 Step Plan to Shift Out of Diet Mentality and the Willpower Trap.

 

Come join me on Facebook Live today, Wednesday at 1:30 pm EST for a free training on this very topic! We will be LIVE on my business page right at this link >

https://www.facebook.com/BRGDieteticsandNutritionPC/

 

“Put Your Best Fork Forward”

March is National Nutrition Month® (NMM) and every year there is a new theme to engage you, the public. NNM was created by the Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics and is intended to promote nutrition education, highlighting the importance of making informed food choices, and developing sound eating and physical activity habits.

 

The theme for this year is “Put Your Best Fork Forward” when dining out and at home.

 

By putting your best fork forward and making healthful decisions, you hold all the power, literally and figuratively.  You get to make the decisions on when, what, and how much you eat.

 

Remember, you already have the nutrition knowledge within yourself needed to make healthful decisions.  You can choose what goes into your body and how much.  It is now time to work on your confidence and empower you to make these decisions.

 

The process of becoming an intuitive eater and no longer being a dieter helps you become confident and regain trust in yourself to make these decisions.  With intuitive eating you learn to listen to your body and fuel it with the food it wants.

 

When you eat intuitively you are putting your best fork forward.

 

Here are 3 tips to help you start your journey to putting your best fork forward:

 

  1. Be Mindful. Being mindful plays a key role in when, what, and how much you eat. If you tend to eat when you are distracted or in response to an emotion, it can be difficult to pay attention to what is on your fork.  Instead, avoid distractions during meal times and sit at a table to truly enjoy what you are eating.

 

  1. Plan ahead. If you are going out to eat, look at the menu ahead of time.  Nowadays there are plenty of healthful options at restaurants that allow you to choose a balanced meal.  If you are making dinner at home, think about what you want to make the day before to ensure you have all the ingredients necessary to prepare your healthy meal when you get home.

 

  1. Explore. One of the great benefits of being an intuitive eater is no food is off limits. Take this month to explore the different tastes, textures, and temperatures of food to find out what you truly enjoy.  You may be surprised that foods you thought you didn’t like you do!

 

It’s time to take charge and take the necessary steps that will empower you to make healthful decisions for yourself.

 

If you would my help and support on your journey, just go to www.TalkWithBonnie.com and we’ll set up a time to talk.

 

National Eating Disorder Awareness Week

Eating disorders affect everyone, regardless of gender, ethnicity, age, socioeconomic status, sexuality, or background.  With today’s media and advertisements showing stick-thin models as the “right” way to look, it makes sense why so many people may develop an eating disorder. A negative body image can lead to serious eating disorder.

 

National Eating Disorder Awareness (NEDAwareness) Week starts this Sunday, February 26th and runs through March 4th.  The theme of this year’s NEDAawareness Week is It’s Time to Talk About It. The National Eating Disorder Association wants to encourage you and everyone else to talk about eating disorders.

 

The two most commonly talked about eating disorders are bulimia and anorexia nervosa.

 

Bulimia is the act of bingeing and purging.  A person with bulimia will often consume more calories in one sitting than they would in a normal day.  This bingeing leads to guilt and self-shaming which turns into purging.  People with bulimia are often a healthy weight but are struggling on the inside.

 

Anorexia nervosa is a disease that tricks your mind into seeing a distorted, often larger, version of yourself.  A person with anorexia starves themselves, forfeiting calories as well as many vitamins and minerals that are necessary to keep their body running.  People with anorexia typically appear thin and fragile, but that isn’t always the case.

 

Although these may be the two disorders that you are familiar with, there are other disordered eating behaviors that you should be aware of.

 

Binge-eating disorder is very similar to bulimia, but without the purging.  A person with binge-eating disorder engages in uncontrollable, continuous eating past the point of fullness.  This is the most common eating disorder in the United States.

 

Orthorexia is an “unhealthy obsession” with healthy eating.  A person with orthorexia nervosa has a fixation on righteous eating and it usually starts as an innocent attempt to eat more healthfully.

 

Regardless of which eating disorder is exhibited, those who are struggling with one seek ways to change their body.  Today’s media makes it hard to find happiness and peace in your own body, so it is important to promote your own body positivity.

 

In order to break free from the daunting stress and pressure from the media, I encourage you to embrace intuitive eating where you can begin to trust your inner body wisdom to guide your eating. Intuitive eating can help you love your body again and change your relationship with food.  This takes time, patience and support.

 

If you or someone you know is struggling with an eating disorder, please share this information and seek help immediately. The sooner you do, the sooner you will find peace with your body.

 

If I can help, please email me at Bonnie@DietFreeRadiantMe.com.

 

Be Your Own Valentine – The Ultimate Gift of Self-Love

It’s Valentine’s Day and I bet you’ve been thinking what you can do for you sweetheart, or what you can buy for him. You have spent countless hours thinking about this, what would make him feel special?

 

Yes, you find it! You are excited! Whether it’s that perfect gift or a special night on the town, you bare no expense when it comes to your honey!

 

That’s awesome! You are a wonderful partner!

 

But what about you? What do you do for yourself? When is the last time you said YES to yourself? When have you splurged on YOU!

 

Most probably it’s been a while. Especially if you have other people who rely on you (kids, spouse, elderly parents etc…). Well, their needs come first, you think.

 

Of, perhaps you don’t feel worthy enough of doing something for yourself. “How can I” plays in your head over and over again.

 

Today, on this day of LOVE, show some LOVE and KINDNESS to yourself. You’ve been struggling with your body, your weight and your food for years, maybe even decades. You think you’ve tried to help yourself by going on a diet, trying the cleanse that Jennifer Aniston was on (wow, look at her amazing body!), or signing up for Weight Watchers again (because if Oprah could lose 42.5 pounds, so could I!).

 

But I just want to talk to you straight from my heart right now. Those diets, cleanses, detoxes, even Weight Watchers won’t work. They never did work and they won’t work now. And you know what? I know you know this. It’s just that you are scared to try something different. Scared to go out of your comfort zone, even though staying in your comfort zone keeps you stuck.

 

Today, on Valentine’s Day, do this for you.

 

Schedule a call with me to see if Freedom to Eat Forever™ is right for you. If it’s not a good fit for either one of us, I will tell you!

 

The program starts on February 22, but you can start TODAY as soon as you give yourself this gift. Once you enroll, you will have immediate access to the Orientation and Pre-training Modules to get you started. Plus, the private Facebook group is already open and you’ll get to know the other amazing women in the group.

 

So, choose your Valentine’s Gift to yourself: Either –

  1. Register here for Freedom to Eat Forever™  
    There is a money back guarantee, so you have nothing to lose!
  2. Schedule a free call with me to see if Freedom to Eat Forever™ is a right fit for you. Click here to pick a time on my calendar.

 

Once you make this decision, you will feel relieved, happy and tickled all over!

 

Happy Valentine’s Day!

 

Freedom to Eat Forever Bonnie GIller

Here’s What to Do to Lose Weight Forever

Freedom to Eat Forever Bonnie GIllerAnyone who works with me knows that self-care is a major part of my work. Between taking an extra few minutes for yourself each day, fueling your body with nourishing foods, and knowing when to ask others for support, there are many ways you can put your self-care in the forefront of your life.

 

The process of improving your self-care may be slow starting and its okay to take baby steps to help yourself.

 

You may have started by giving yourself a few minutes to de-stress each day and eventually moved to learning how to prioritize your activities so you are doing what you enjoy most.

 

I have seen a lot of great turnarounds over the last year; people like yourself who have taken their self-care from the back burner to the front and center of their life. Making this shift is a major step on your intuitive eating journey.

 

Yet, what I am finding is that many of you are stopping there.

 

You are not taking the process to the next level.

 

You are seeking out free resources to help you become an intuitive eater, yet you are still spinning your wheels.

 

You are taking 3 steps forward, 2 steps backward.

 

Sure, if you continue at this pace, you may eventually get to where you want to be (an intuitive eater) but why wait that long?

 

You can accelerate the process by partnering with the right person who will guide you using an organized proven system.

 

I am that person for you.  And I have the system for you.

 

It’s the Freedom to Eat Forever™ Program, a 5 step intuitive eating process that will enable you to enjoy guilt-free eating and a life free of dieting.

 

But you know what? You have to step up to the plate and invest in yourself and your future. It’s when you invest in yourself that you see the results. I did it, and so can you.

 

Check out this cool video. Then email me or Facebook message me if you want to see if it’s your time for Freedom to Eat Forever™.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hurry. Class starts February 22, 2017. I don’t want you to be left out. Take your intuitive eating to the next level.

 

Are You Destined to Be Fat?

You know how to eat healthfully. You have heard it time and time again.

 

Eat whole foods, lean proteins, whole grains, plenty of fruits and veggies (the colors of the rainbow) and healthy fats. And, yes, avoid highly processed foods!

 

You don’t need anyone to tell you this! You know this already.

 

You actually have eaten like this. Then stopped eating like this. Then started eating like this again, then stopped again! Yikes, I’m getting dizzy!

 

Why do you NOT do what you know is good for you?

 

Well, there might be several reasons. For starters, it’s easy to fall back into old habits. Change is hard, there’s no doubt about that. And change takes time, patience and perseverance. You can do it as long as life cooperates. But once life throws you a curve ball, you haven’t learned how to juggle that curve ball while maintaining your newfound healthy habits. So, you fall back into old familiar habits that feel safe, even if they aren’t healthy for you.

 

Now, don’t feel bad about this. It happens to the best of us. What you should feel bad about is if you don’t keep trying. If you just throw in the towel and say and do one of the two following statements:

 

  • “It doesn’t matter, I’m destined to be fat, and so I might as well just forget trying. I’m going to enjoy my food and I’ll show them (by the way, who is “them”)?”

 

  • “I’m going to try the Atkins diet again, or Weight Watchers for the umpteenth time”.

 

Now, let’s discuss each of the above statements.

 

In statement number one, you are engaging in pessimistic thinking (the cup is half empty). This type of self-talk is negative messaging that only leads to more unhappiness and self-destructive thoughts and behaviors.

 

In statement number two, you know full well that diets don’t work. I don’t care what diet it is. Diets just don’t work as a ‘forever’.

 

Again, you know this. So, why do you fall for the fad diet’s false advertising time and time again?

 

I am going to explain why in full detail AND I am going to give away my 5 Step System to Break Free of Dieting so you can get the body and life you love on my upcoming Free Online Training.

 

Here are the deets:

 

Tuesday, February 7, 2017 at 8 pm EST/5 pm PST.

 

Register for free HERE.

 

You don’t want to miss this event.  I am going to shed some light on those limiting beliefs and mental blocks that are holding you back from committing to breaking free from dieting!  If you really want to lose weight and never gain it back, join me on February 7th!

 

There is no reason not to show up live.

 

Register for free HERE.

 

Did You Get Sucked in to the New Year’s Diet Scheme?

I’m sure it feels like everyone you know is starting a new diet or workout regime this month. In the past I’m sure that even YOU have fallen into the hypnosis of the “January start a new diet” trend set by the diet industry. I want to challenge you to try a different approach to your health this year.

 

The truth is that every “new diet” you see is actually the same. There is always going to be the latest trend hitting the internet or newsstands. But at the end of the day, all diets have one thing in common: someone other than yourself is telling you what to eat, when to eat, and how to eat.  And truth be told, they aren’t going to help you feel better about your relationship with food OR yourself.

 

So, let’s not kick off 2017 with a cloud of dieting thoughts over your head, okay? It’s time to jump OFF the diet roller coaster and to start listening to your inner wisdom.

 

Who better to listen to than your own body?

 

Okay, so this sounds all great, right? And the new programs that are being marketed now are calling themselves “Lifestyle Programs”. But let me let you in on a little secret. Those “Lifestyle Programs” are just fancy names for diets. They say they want to help you make lifestyle changes, but they are still giving you lists of foods to eat and not to eat.

 

Oh, by the way, don’t even get me started on those doctors with Harvard degrees that are promoting “Detoxes”. Give me a break! Anyone is going to lose weight if they drink these concoctions for a week or a month. Then what happens after the detox is over? You know what happens….

 

But I divert. Let me get back on course here.
If you are riding the diet roller coaster, you’re probably unhappy with your body and have an unhealthy relationship with food.

 

Coming next month I have a free training called “The 5 Steps to Break Free of Dieting” where I explain the 5 steps you need to get the body and life you love without the pain and restriction of dieting.

 

Come join our Facebook community group to get notified when this free training will take place, or check back to this blog next week for more information!