Tag Archive for: emotional eating

Do You Feed Your Emotions?

copy-of-webinar-replay-3One of the things that come up often in my work with my clients is how they deal with their emotions.  We all experience different emotions throughout a given day.  Those emotions can be sadness, happiness, stress, anxiety, boredom or many others.  It is totally normal to experience these emotions from time to time, but how you cope with them is key.

 

So let me ask you a question: How do you handle your emotions?

 

Do you look for support from someone close to you?

 

Do you journal how you are feeling and use one of your coping mechanisms to help you get through it?

 

Or, do you reach for food?

 

Do you find yourself reaching into the food cabinets when these emotions arise?  How do you feel after you eat your “go-to” mood fixer food?

 

As an emotional eater you use food as a way to solve your problems, so you think.  But in reality, food will not make these problems go away.  They will certainly distract you for a time but once you stop eating, the problem and your feelings will still be there. You sadness, anxiety, boredom or stress, will still need to be addressed.  But now, there is likely some added guilt and physical discomfort from overeating.

 

Does this sound like you?

 

If it does, know you are not alone.

 

Here are 4 steps you can take today to move away from emotional eating:

 

  1. Acknowledge when you turn to food to comfort your emotions. Are you choosing foods to help numb your emotion?  What emotions are you feeling in that moment?  Take a moment to breathe and think about what you are doing.  Journal what comes up for you.

 

  1. Stop and listen to your body before turning to food. What are you truly feeling?   If you can honestly say you are hungry, then by all means you should eat….a well-balanced power snack or meal. But if you are being true to yourself and really want to help yourself, you won’t automatically say “I’m hungry”. Instead, you will think about what you are feeling and how you can comfort yourself without turning to food.

 

  1. Seek support from a loved one or counselor. Talking through your emotions instead of eating through them is an amazing feeling.

 

  1. Journal things that you enjoy doing that can distract your during your emotional times. Take a walk, do a puzzle, read a book, etc.  Figure out what works best for you.

 

Let’s dig even deeper into how to end emotional eating.

 

Join me on Thursday, October 13th for a free live training called A Simple (and Delicious) Way to End Emotional Eating.

 

Click here to learn more and to register.

 

 

Read This if You are an Emotional Eater

facebook-live-ee-body-image-pvt-groupThere is nothing wrong with foods being a source of pleasure.  In fact, the more positive your relationship with food, the better you will feel about your eating habits.

 

But, there is a fine line between a positive food relationship and using food as comfort.

 

The notion of seeking “comfort” from certain foods can lead to problems with your relationship with food.  If you are eating something to gain a sense of comfort, this begins to connect your eating to emotions instead of satiety.

 

There is a difference between eating a food you love because you are enjoying the taste of it or the ceremony for which the food represents, and eating to soothe emotions.

 

If you eat to feed your emotions, then you may be an emotional eater.

 

Let’s take a look at the cycle of emotional eating:

 

Your emotional trigger might be stress or even lonliness, which can lead to overeating and bingeing.  You might be looking for “something” to fill a void that you seem to have in your life.  That food may give you relief in the moment, but shame, guilt and body bashing can quickly follow.

 

This can become a vicious cycle, leaving you with a poor body image, negative self-image and those same emotions you started with.

 

When you eat for comfort, you are likely looking to avoid feeling whatever feelings you are experiencing. Because let’s face it, feeling feelings is hard! You hope that food will solve whatever problem you are having, but you know what? Food will not solve the problem.  Once you stop eating, the root of your problems will still be there. And on top of that, you likely feel bloated, tired and physically uncomfortable.

 

The best way to deal with your emotions is to look at the root of the problem, instead of turning to food.

 

Use food as fuel rather than therapy.

 

This is not to say you can’t eat the foods you previously considered to be “comfort foods”.  Instead, simply redefine their place in your eating plan, and make them a part of your healthy lifestyle, not a part of your mental well-being.

 

Would you like to delve further into your emotional eating? 

 

Join me for Facebook Live in my Private Facebook Community on Thursday October 6th  at 8 pm Eastern where I will coach you through your biggest emotional eating and body image challenges.

 

No Facebook? No Worries!

 

Sign up HERE for a FREE TRAINING on October 13th

 

Topic: A Simple (and Delicious) Way to End Emotional Eating

 

 

PS: Even if you attend our Facebook Live, I recommend you still register for the Free Training.

 

 

How to Prevent Rebound Eating

Woman contemplating fruit or cakeHow many times have you done this: You want to look good for an event on the weekend so you spend the next week or 2 restricting your food and calories thinking you’ll shed 10 pounds by the weekend? And when that event is over you make up for lost time by indulging in all the foods that you were deprived of on that “diet” you were on? This is called rebound or binge eating. It is a vicious cycle that can lead to disordered eating patterns.

 

Depriving your body of the foods it wants over time can really take a toll on your body and mind. It can lead to cravings so bad that when you do finally allow yourself to eat what you want you could spiral out of control and end up bingeing on it. Then to compensate you might go back to restricting or trying to “work it off” at the gym which will only continue the cycle.

 

By incorporating intuitive eating into your life, you can break this cycle. Eat the foods you want when you want. But be mindful. If you want chocolate cake, have some cake. Don’t have the whole cake but have enough until you are satisfied. Eating a slice of cake won’t set you back on your weight or health goals, but depriving yourself until that cake is all you can think of just might.

 

Before deciding what to eat ask yourself these questions:

 

What do I really want?

 

  • You tell yourself you should get the salad when you’re out to dinner because it’s a healthy option, but you really want your favorite pasta dish. What should you do? You could get the salad and not be satisfied while watching your family enjoy their pasta. Or you can honor your preference and order the pasta. Consider asking for an appetizer portion or have the waiter bring half the portion and pack the other half to go. This way you can enjoy the pasta without the worry of overeating from the extra large portions restaurants usually give you.

 

Am I choosing the food because it’s what I should eat?

 

  •  Who’s to say what you should or should not eat? Only you are the owner of your body and your food choices! Don’t fall prey to the “good food” “bad food” list diets give you. Own your choices!

 

Am I emotionally eating or am I really hungry?

 

  • If you’re craving a certain comfort food but you’re not actually hungry, this could be because you are feeding your emotions. Try to make yourself feel better by getting to the root of your emotions and find ways to fix them without food. Read more about this here.

 

Eating shouldn’t be an all or nothing sort of thing. If you give into your cravings once in a while you are not a failure. Extremes are easy, but finding balance within yourself and your eating is the hard part.

 

I know this isn’t easy.  If you need help feel free to reach out to me here.

 

 

Are You Feeding Your Stomach or Emotions?

Emotional eating quoteIf you are having one of those days where nothing seems to go right and all you want is something to make you feel better, what do you reach for?  Are you reaching for food?  If so, is that bag of chips really making you feel better?

 

“I had a long day and the only thing that will make me feel better is my favorite junk food!”

 

Does this sound like something you would say?  I have many clients that come to me seeking help in dealing with their emotional eating.  They find themselves eating when they are stressed, upset or bored, and they don’t feel satisfied afterwards. In fact, they feel guilty, ashamed and desperate.

 

I help my clients to realize they will not feel satisfied when they are feeding their emotions.

 

I want to help you understand this too.

 

Emotional eating is eating in response to feelings, not because you are physically hungry.

 

Eating away your emotions may make you feel better for an instant, but when the bag is empty you’re left with the same feelings of guilt, the discomfort of overeating, plus those original emotions you had in the first place.

Whether you are eating as a way to reward yourself for a job well done or trying to make yourself feel better after a rough day, this form of emotional eating can affect your mood and health long after the bag is empty.

 

To identify if you are emotionally eating, you should figure out what is driving your desire to eat.  Are you experiencing physical hunger or psychological hunger?

 

Ask yourself the following questions:

  • “How am I feeling? Am I upset, angry, tired or even happy? Could this be causing me to crave a certain food?”
  • “Do I usually use food for comfort?”
  • “Do I associate rewards with food?” Maybe you just received a promotion, is your first thought “I’ll celebrate with dessert tonight?”
  • “When was the last time I ate?” Natural hunger cues start to occur a couple of hours after you last ate.  If you just ate, you might not be experiencing physical hunger.

 

These habits can be hard to break and you will need to dig deep inside of you to figure out what you are truly feeling.  This isn’t always easy as sometimes it’s uncomfortable to feel your emotions.  I get it.

 

One way to deal with your emotions without food is to distract yourself.

 

Here are some tips you can try today to help you regain control over your emotions:

  • Go for a walk to get endorphins going and help you clear your mind.
  • Do yoga or meditation to clear your mind and help you relax.
  • Call or text a friend to talk about your day or vent, if needed.
  • Watch your favorite show for a good laugh.
  • Read a book to get someone else’s point of view.
  • Take a nap to regain energy.
  • Write how you are feeling in a journal.

 

Distractions may work for a short time.  Ultimately you must dig deeper to understand why you turn to food in hard times.

 

I am here to help you.  I can help you work out your emotions and teach you ways to deal with them that do not involve food.  I can teach you to listen to your body’s hunger cues and eat only when you are experiencing physical hunger.  Take care of yourself by being in tune with your emotions. Dealing with them now instead of letting them build up will benefit you and your overall health.

 

Contact me here if you’d like to chat.

Chocolate Doesn’t Solve Your Problems

Overwt woman contemplating chocLife is hard sometimes, wouldn’t you say? Things can be going along wonderfully and then all of a sudden BAM, you get hit in the face with a situation that you are not quite ready for. What I’ve learned in my life is firstly that this is just a part of life. We become better people when we go through tough situations and we learn from them. And, secondly, I’ve learned that food (and for most people…chocolate) does not make the problem go away.

 

Now, I know you are reading this and perhaps you are saying “you are wrong Bonnie, chocolate makes it all better”.

 

And, to that I say, it makes it all better for the moment you are in your empty body, stuffing the chocolate in your mouth, pushing your feelings down deeper and deeper. But now, the chocolate is gone and what are you left with?

 

THE PAIN! The pain of still dealing with the difficult feelings you had originally, AND the pain of the GUILT of bingeing on chocolate and the PHYSICAL PAIN of eating too much of it.

 

So, what are you to do when you just don’t want to deal with the situation that has presented to you in your life?

 

You SUCK IT UP AND DEAL WITH IT!

 

WITHOUT. THE. CHOCOLATE.

 

Yes, I know that sounds harsh, and I don’t mean to be harsh. But it’s just a part of life. You are here on my blog reading my articles, following my work because you want help. You want and need someone to say to you “let’s learn how to deal with your emotions and difficult situations in life without using food. Because food is not the answer.”

 

Here are 2 steps for you to take immediately so you can learn how to turn away from the chocolate when feeling down:

 

Step 1: Make a list of the situations and/or emotions that cause you to turn to chocolate (or any food for that matter).

 

Step 2: Click on this link to request to speak to me so I can help you craft a plan to overcome emotional eating.

 

I look forward to speaking with you soon!

 

 

 

 

 

Is Intuitive Eating just for Women? A True Father’s Day Gift!

Intuitive Eating is Not Just for Women! (1)I recently had a potential client express how he was stuck in the dieting mindset.  He had tried many diets before and has lost the weight and gained it right back.  He has feelings of failure and did not know how to break out of the cycle.  I suggested intuitive eating and how it can help him.  He realized that is exactly what he needs, but hesitated for two reasons:

 

Reason #1: He is so used to wanting and getting results quickly, that to engage in a “food behavior therapy-type” program wasn’t going to get him the instant results.

 

Reason #2: He thought this type of deep work was only for women, and what would people think if he embarked on this journey?

 

Well, after a few more minutes of conversation, he realized that reason #1 was exactly why he was speaking to me in the first place. Yes, all those diets gave him quick results, but those results never lasted. So, what good were they?

 

As for reason #2, I get it. Quite a few men think the path towards intuitive eating is more for women than men.

 

But listen up men! Intuitive eating is not just for women.  Men and women were both born intuitive eaters and the process to reclaim this is unisex and can benefit everyone.

 

The work I do with my clients in my 5 Step Intuitive Eating Program is a step-by-step process to help you transform your relationship with food, where you end the battle with food and your body and achieve great pleasure in eating once again.

 

If you are a man reading this blog, I’m sure you have your reasons as to why you assume this process is just for women.  Men don’t like to talk about their emotions, right?  May I ask you why?  Is it because of what society thinks? Is it just because men don’t “do emotions”?

 

Men – It is OK to talk about your emotions!  You are not alone.  Intuitive eating will show you and teach you how to cope with your emotions without food!

 

With intuitive eating, you’ll be able to enjoy eating your favorite foods without experiencing the guilt afterwards.  You’ll learn to accept your body, and with acceptance comes appreciation of your body.  From there, your mindset will change and you’ll be able to build a better relationship with food.  Your body will thank you.

 

What better time to take charge of your health and break free of the dieting mindset than around Father’s Day? 

 

Here are two steps you can take today to start the journey to become an intuitive eater:

 

  1. Commit to saying goodbye to the quick – fixes. Truly recognize this isn’t your long-term solution.

 

  1. Take advantage of my Father’s Day Gift to you – a Break Free of Dieting Strategy Session. During this session we will uncover the challenges that’s been holding you back from losing weight forever, and we will map out your intuitive eating path. Just click here to schedule your free session.

 

Happy Father’s Day!

 

 

How to NOT Eat When You Are Sad

photo-1422433555807-2559a27433bdIn your life, there has probably been a day or a moment when you felt sad or lonely. Maybe even right now, as you read this blog. This doesn’t mean you have to be diagnosed with clinical depression. It just means that you are sad.

 

Perhaps you heard news about a loved one’s illness, you got let go from your job, lost a client or got disciplined at work. Or, maybe you are struggling with loving your body and loving who you see in the mirror today.

 

While there are a multitude of reasons why you might be sad, the question I want to ask you is how do you handle that sadness? Do you turn to food to make the pain go away? Do you say “I don’t care, I just want to eat this chocolate cake, it will make me feel better?” You very well know that while that chocolate cake will numb you in that moment, it won’t take away the original source of your sadness. So when you are finished with the cake, which lead to the ice cream and perhaps even to the Kit Kat bars, you now feel bloated, tired, have heartburn and totally disgusted with yourself.

 

And, even more sad.

 

Let me share a story with you if I may. I was having a rough week last week. Suffice it to say I have been working very hard supporting my clients, and at the same time balancing my family responsibilities. Yes, the work/life balance is sometimes not so easy.

 

I recognized I was at a point where I needed to do something. My old way of handling the emotions I was feeling would have been to turn to the peanut butter jar. But instead, I decided to ask myself “what do you need Bonnie?” And I got my answer.

 

I needed to spend time with my parents, who are out of state. I needed to hug them and talk to them and seek their advice. I needed connection as I miss them terribly. Yes, I could “see” them via Facetime, but it’s not the same. I cannot hug Facetime.

 

So, I did something I never did before. I booked a flight and went to see them, by myself. My husband and kids were so supportive. I love them so much for recognizing my need and giving me their blessing. “We will be okay”, they said.

 

I had a wonderful time this past weekend just relaxing and connecting with my parents. I took care of my self-care needs. I slept late (which was very much needed), did not put on makeup (I put on makeup every day when I go to work), went for a long walk listening to music from the time when I dated my husband-we had a special song) and sat at the pool and listened to the birds chirp. While I was only away for 3 days, it felt like so much longer and it was amazing.

 

I returned home to my family and clients rejuvenated and ready to support them from a place of abundance.

 

I recognize that not everyone can pick themselves up and leave for a few days. This certainly isn’t something I usually do either. But, you can find whatever it is that YOU need right now to help you deal with your emotions instead of turning to food.

 

Ask yourself that one simple question I asked myself. Here’s that question again:

 

“What do I need right now?”

 

Answer yourself honestly, and follow through. You’ll be happy you did.

 

If you need help learning to cope with your emotions without food, please reach out to me. Email me at Bonnie@DietFreeRadiantMe.com and let me know what you’re struggling with now.

 

 

Stress Less this Holiday Season

DFRM_StressLessEatLess_PrintHeaderWith the upcoming holidays it’s easy to get lost in the chaos. Don’t let yourself feel out of control this year. Start your holiday season off on the right foot! Make this the year that you conquer your dieting habits and turn to intuitive and mindful eating for a body you love.

Here are a few suggestions that work for me during the busy holiday season. I hope you find them helpful too.

  • Set yourself up for success

As I’ve mentioned many times before and I will probably suggest many times again, set yourself up for success. Do a clean sweep of your kitchen before you begin your cooking. I don’t mean sweep the floor, I mean tuck away all tempting foods – out of sight, out of mind. Take those holiday cookies and sweets and put them in the pantry or kitchen cabinet so they won’t be staring at you while you cook.

  • Be sure to eat breakfast each day

Skipping breakfast or lunch before your holiday meal will cause you to be exceptionally hungry when it’s time for the main meal. You might think you’re doing yourself a favor but you will likely eat more than your stomach can handle and you won’t feel good afterwards. Or you might fill up on appetizers and feel full before the meal even begins. Understand that maintaining a state of satisfaction is a huge part of eating right.

  • Pace Yourself

During the meal, pacing yourself is key. Put your fork down and spend time talking to relatives in between bites. As you space out your meal you allow your brain to register the food that is entering your stomach. Your body will be able to signal when you are satisfied and have eaten enough.

  • Anticipate the stress

The holidays are a balancing act. Prepare yourself for stressful situations and learn how to best manage a stressful event so that you do not turn to food to ease the stress. If you know you are going to see family members or friends who drain you physically and emotionally, take the time to mentally prepare yourself in advance. Think of strategies to handle situations and come up with solutions to destress. This can be finding a comforting place to take a break, whether it be your car or an empty room.

 

The stress that comes from the cooking, the cleaning, the planning and of course the eating can all be balanced with the right strategies and support.

 

In honor of the holidays, I have ONE TIME opportunity that I’d like to extend to you.

 

I will personally coach you through the holidays in my Stress Less EAT LESS™ Program. Learn the 3 key steps to best manage the stress and overwhelm to STOP STRESS EATING once and for all.

 

Stress Less EAT LESS™ is a 4 week program that includes live group coaching calls, a private Facebook group, My Holiday Menu Planner and Recipe Guide and so much more.

Save $100 by getting all the details and signing up HERE.

 

We start November 30th so don’t wait.

 

Have questions, email me at Bonnie@DietFreeRadiantMe.com

 

 

 

 

 

 

There’s No “Throwing in the Towel” in Intuitive Eating

Shocked WomanIf you are a chronic dieter, then more than likely you have “thrown in the towel” quite a few times.

 

A new diet comes to market. It’s exciting, this will be the one. You start the diet and things are going well. But then you had a bad day at work, you went on vacation or you had a fight with your boyfriend. Or, you get on the scale on weigh-in day and it hasn’t budged.

 

Either way, you ended up in the pint of ice cream saying to yourself “forget it, what does it matter anyway”.

 

You have just “thrown in the towel” from another diet. When will this end?

 

I’ll tell you when!  When you finally realize that diets are not working for you. Never have, never will. When you decide that to give up dieting, you need another path. And, you have discovered intuitive eating is that path.

 

Okay, so let’s talk about this. You start working with me to learn how to reclaim being an intuitive eater (I say “reclaim” because let me remind you that you were born an intuitive eater). And you immediately are having major “aha” moments. Wow, you are discovering things about yourself, your past, your beliefs that you never realized impacted your relationship with food.

 

This is great! You laugh, you cry, all from a good place of finally moving forward.

 

Then it happens. You disappear, stop showing up for your appointments and stop returning emails and phone calls.

 

What is going on?

 

More than likely, an old familiar trigger has popped up and you haven’t yet learned how to handle it. So, you fall back into past overeating habits. Now you feel bad, embarrassed and say to yourself “you see, this won’t work either”. And, you throw in the towel.

 

Please listen up! What I’m about to say requires capital letters.

 

THERE IS NO FAILURE IN INTUITIVE EATING!

 

THERE IS NO “THROWING IN THE TOWEL” IN INTUITIVE EATING!

 

Intuitive eating is a learning experience. It’s a process of ups and downs. Whatever trigger has thrown you “for a loop”, let’s learn from it. Don’t let it take you back to a place that you DON”T want to be….back to the land of dieting!

 

If this sounds like you, I care about you and I am here to help you.

 

Reach out and ask for help. There’s no shame in that. It’s something to be proud of.

 

Click here to send me an SOS email.

The Rush for the French Fries

IMG_4142.JPGWere you ever eating with another person, or group of people, and found that you were eating so quickly for fear there wouldn’t be more food available if you wanted another portion?

 

Yesterday, my daughter Lauren spent the day with her friends. She has another few days before camp begins and they decided to walk to the local pizza store. The girls each ordered their respective slice of pizza, and one order of fries to share.

 

They placed the fries in the center of the table. And, here’s what my daughter reported.

 

Everyone was eating so fast, hurrying to eat the fries for fear that they would run out really quickly or one of them would eat more than the other. I explained to my daughter that this is a form of “rebound eating” and happens when one feels like they are in competition for the food and fears food deprivation.

 

I found it interesting that Lauren mentioned this to me, as she clearly noticed that something was wrong with this picture.

 

There are many reasons and different scenarios that you might find yourself in where you resort to overeating, even binge eating. More than likely if you are a yo-yo dieter or emotional eater with a list of forbidden foods, this happens quite often when you finally give in and eat something on your forbidden food list.

 

The key is to realize that no one food has the power to help you lose weight or gain weight. I know, there are a lot of so called “experts” on the internet telling you, no let me correct that…shouting at you, to “avoid these 5 foods at all costs” or something similar. They make you think that if you avoid those foods, your skinny jeans will fit you perfectly and your prayers will be answered.

 

Not so.

 

Take the power back from the food! You are in charge of your food choices. When you do this, you will see your forbidden food list begin to shrink, and you might even surprise yourself and realize that you don’t happen to even like those foods that plagued you for so long.

 

Your turn to take action: Share with me below a time when you felt you were in competition for your food and you feared deprivation.