5 Tips to Get Your Spouse on Board With Your Intuitive Eating Journey

There are many people that I coach in my intuitive eating program who complain to me that their spouse is not supportive of their journey. This is either because they just “don’t get it”, or they think that you should be able to “do it on your own”.

They may say to you, “just stop eating”; they don’t understand it’s not about the food.

Do you find this to be true about your spouse?

Let’s explore this further. Perhaps your spouse is a dieter and isn’t ready to stop dieting. Or they don’t see an issue with your eating and don’t understand your need to make changes.

If we go even deeper, they may fear that your relationship will change once your relationship with food changes. After all, who will they binge-eat with at night while watching TV?

Whatever the reason, there are ways to get your spouse on board with your intuitive eating journey. And there are ways you can approach the topic of support without them getting defensive.

5 Tips to Get Your Spouse on Board

1. Share Your BIG WHY with Them

This will help them understand why you’ve made the decision to no longer diet and why you are making changes in the house. If you explain to them your desire to be more in tune with your body and why this is important to you, they’ll know more about what you need, i.e., no T.V. while you eat dinner.

2. Be Open with Your Struggles

Sometimes your spouse can be threatened by your new way of living because as we said, they may be a yo-yo dieter and not ready to stop dieting. It can be helpful to show them that it’s not that you’re better than them; it’s that you are ready to end your struggle as you’ve come to the realization that diets don’t work for you. And you need help. Explain to them that you are struggling with your relationship with food and need to make changes in your own life to help form a stronger, and healthier relationship with food.

3. Be Specific with The Support You Need

Remember that your spouse isn’t a mind reader! If you want help, you need to specifically ask for it. The more specific you are, the more support and help they will be able to give. If they always suggest going out to dinner for happy and sad occasions, ask them if you can do something else together that doesn’t revolve around food for those same occasions.  Whatever it is, just be specific!

4. Understand It’s Not About You, It’s Often About Them

Unfortunately, your spouse may not understand what you are going through and won’t want to make changes in his own life, even if they are better for you. If that’s the case, remember it’s about them and has nothing to do with you. You can still change your relationship with food and look for support from friends and others on the same journey as you. Hopefully, once they see how happy you are with your changes, they’ll get on board too!

5. Don’t Try to Change Them

You can’t force your spouse to change his lifestyle just because you want them to. Although it would be nice and better for you, they don’t need to change. You are still able to change your own relationship with food, even if they don’t change theirs.

Ultimately this journey is all about you! If you are not finding the support you need at home, you can join multiple groups with other people on the same journey as you. You are not alone!