weight loss Archives - Page 4 of 7 - Diet Free Radiant Me | Intuitive Eating | Emotional Eating

There’s No All or Nothing in Intuitive Eating

I recently had a client share her success story. Let’s call her Susan. Susan was at an office party when two delicious looking cakes were served. She knew she wouldn’t be able to resist trying the cakes, so she took a small piece of each on her plate. She ate a few bites of the chocolate cake, then a few bites of the white cream cake, and something amazing happened!

She didn’t feel the need to eat more! She was shocked. She was practicing mindfulness around her eating and she savored each bite and she was satisfied before she polished off both pieces.

This. Never. Happened. To. Her. Before.

How did she do this you ask?

By using the intuitive eating strategies that I am teaching her, she is learning to move away from the all or nothing way of thinking. She didn’t feel guilty for indulging in a food she wanted. She has made peace with food and has reaped the benefits which is showing up in so many ways in her life.

Had she found herself in this scenario a few months ago before we began working together, the outcome would have been different. The all or nothing thinking is part of a diet mentality and usually leads to overeating, followed by guilt, unhappiness, dieting, restriction, overeating etc. It’s a vicious cycle.

Intuitive eating is tuning into what your body wants, even if it’s a slice of cake, and giving it what it wants. If you listen to your body, you won’t feel the need to overeat and have guilt afterwards. Your body will be happy it can enjoy the foods it wants.

You may be asking yourself, “How do I get myself to this point?” The answer is to change your mindset. You have to step away from the diet mentality of restricting certain foods or entire food groups.

The way to make peace with food is to give yourself unconditional permission to eat what you want. I know, this sounds like an opportunity to eat uncontrollably. And to be honest with you, some people use it as an excuse to do just that.

It’s a process my dear readers. It does not happen overnight. Those who work through the process with the support, encouragement, positive attitude and patience are the ones who will experience what Susan did. The intuitive eating process can help you transform your relationship with food, where you end the battle with food and your body and achieve great pleasure in eating once again.

Here are two steps you can take today to become and intuitive eater and change your mindset:

Commit to saying goodbye to the dieting mindset! It is time to recognize that you can have your cake and eat it too. It doesn’t have to be all or nothing.

Start tuning in and listening to your body. Your body gives you signals when it starts to get hungry and full. Tune into these signals to know when and what you should feed your body. You’ll learn to eat what your body craves without overeating.

I am here to help you embark on this journey and break out of the dieting mindset.

If you’d like further individualized support, just fill out this risk free request form at www.TalkWithBonnie.com.

How to Break Through Your Limiting Beliefs Around Weight Loss

Something is keeping you stuck. Something keeps you trying each new diet that hits the market even though you know by now that diets don’t work.

Okay, so when I say “diets don’t work”, let me clarify.

Diets DO work in the short term by helping you lose weight, but ultimately they FAIL in the long term because you gain that weight back, plus some! So why oh why do you keep trying to follow a diet? And let’s be real for a minute. When you visit a registered dietitian nutritionist and ask for a “meal plan”, that is just a nicer way to say diet. If you don’t understand what I mean, read my story here.

So, let’s understand a little about why you might be resistant to giving up dieting.

Perhaps you think that a diet is the only way to lose weight. (Wrong!)

Perhaps you are too scared to trust that you actually know how to eat if you would just listen to your body. (I get that this might be true, but I can help you learn to re-trust your body again!)

Perhaps you really don’t want to be successful in losing weight. (Bingo!)

Wait, what did I just say? You don’t really want to lose weight? That’s insane. Of course you do, that’s why you try diet after diet, right?

I want to focus on that third bullet point. Dig deep down and ask yourself if you really want to lose the weight forever. What are your fears around shedding the layers that are possibly protecting you? What do you need to be protected from?

Consider some of the following beliefs that you might be holding onto, and understand these are preventing you from moving forward on your journey towards a body you love.

Do you ever say any of the following?

“I’m destined to be fat.”

“I will gain the weight back so why bother.”

“I won’t be able to trust myself around food.”

“Losing weight and changing my habits is hard, I’ll never be able to do it.”

These are all beliefs that MUST be knocked down, smashed through and turned upside down or you will still stay stuck where you are forever!

Sit in a quiet room and think. Just think about these beliefs you have around losing weight and your body. Then commit to getting the support you need to change your thought patterns and your behaviors.

Listen, I know you want to do this yourself. I get it. It’s embarrassing to ask for support, so you think.

I’m here to tell you there’s nothing to be embarrassed about. Come join other women (and some men) who are on the journey towards breaking down these negative beliefs and who are now believing in themselves. Click here and join our community, for free.

And, if you’d like further individualized support, just fill out this request at www.TalkWithBonnie.com

Is Intuitive Eating just for Women? A True Father’s Day Gift!

I recently had a potential client express how he was stuck in the dieting mindset. He had tried many diets before and has lost the weight and gained it right back. He has feelings of failure and did not know how to break out of the cycle. I suggested intuitive eating and how it can help him. He realized that is exactly what he needs, but hesitated for two reasons:

Reason #1: He is so used to wanting and getting results quickly, that to engage in a “food behavior therapy-type” program wasn’t going to get him the instant results.

Reason #2: He thought this type of deep work was only for women, and what would people think if he embarked on this journey?

Well, after a few more minutes of conversation, he realized that reason #1 was exactly why he was speaking to me in the first place. Yes, all those diets gave him quick results, but those results never lasted. So, what good were they?

As for reason #2, I get it. Quite a few men think the path towards intuitive eating is more for women than men.

But listen up men! Intuitive eating is not just for women. Men and women were both born intuitive eaters and the process to reclaim this is unisex and can benefit everyone.

The work I do with my clients in my 5 Step Intuitive Eating Program is a step-by-step process to help you transform your relationship with food, where you end the battle with food and your body and achieve great pleasure in eating once again.

If you are a man reading this blog, I’m sure you have your reasons as to why you assume this process is just for women. Men don’t like to talk about their emotions, right? May I ask you why? Is it because of what society thinks? Is it just because men don’t “do emotions”?

Men – It is OK to talk about your emotions! You are not alone. Intuitive eating will show you and teach you how to cope with your emotions without food!

With intuitive eating, you’ll be able to enjoy eating your favorite foods without experiencing the guilt afterwards. You’ll learn to accept your body, and with acceptance comes appreciation of your body. From there, your mindset will change and you’ll be able to build a better relationship with food. Your body will thank you.

What better time to take charge of your health and break free of the dieting mindset than around Father’s Day?

Here are two steps you can take today to start the journey to become an intuitive eater:

Commit to saying goodbye to the quick – fixes. Truly recognize this isn’t your long-term solution.

Take advantage of my Father’s Day Gift to you – a Break Free of Dieting Strategy Session. During this session we will uncover the challenges that’s been holding you back from losing weight forever, and we will map out your intuitive eating path. Just click here to schedule your free session.

Happy Father’s Day!

3 Reasons Why I Will Never Diet Again, and Neither Should You

I will never diet again. I say this with confidence. I know that diets don’t work. I also know that in my younger years, whenever I was on a diet, I was miserable. Oh, yes, I always lost weight on the diet, but then I gained that weight back.

If you are reading this blog, I bet you can relate. You are a dieter, a chronic dieter. Perhaps you are reading this after breaking your current diet and you are desperate to find another way. Or, you are reading this and you are at your goal weight, having lost the excess pounds by starving yourself, drinking shakes or eating “clean” but tasteless food.

Here are 3 reasons WHY I will never diet again and neither should you:

1. Diets cause you to think about food ALL. THE. TIME. What did I eat yesterday, what did I eat before, what am I eating now, what will I eat later, what will I eat tomorrow. Whew, that’s exhausting. Food should not be the center of your day, food should not encompass your entire brain. There is so much more to life that you can be doing than thinking about food all the time.

2. Diets cause you to feel guilty when you eat something you think you should not eat. The diet lists foods for you to choose and those to avoid. But what if you happen to want to eat a food that’s on the “avoid” list? Well, what usually happens when you are told you cannot have something? Yep, you want it more (everyone always gets this question right!) You can deny your desire for only so long. So you indulge and the guilty feelings and harsh self-talk start. Isn’t it time to put that to bed?

3. Diets cause you to lose trust in your own food decisions. Well, last I checked, I am the owner of my body, of my inner signals and my thoughts. I can certainly make decisions about what I want to eat. Don’t you think you should too?

These are only 3 reasons I will never diet again, and why you shouldn’t either. There are plenty more that perhaps I’ll discuss in another blog.

In the meantime, I would like to hear from you. Do you resonate with any of the side effects of dieting I discussed above? How will you break this vicious cycle? Let me know in the comments below.

And, come and join the discussion in my free private Facebook group where you’ll join women and men who are giving up dieting too. Click here to request free access.

5 Steps to STOP Dieting Once and For All

You know how to eat healthfully. You have heard it time and time again.

Eat whole foods, lean proteins, whole grains, plenty of fruits and veggies (the colors of the rainbow) and healthy fats. And, yes, avoid highly processed foods!

You don’t need a “Food Revolution” to tell you this! You know this already.

You actually have eaten like this. Then stopped eating like this. Then started eating like this again, then stopped again! Yikes, I’m getting dizzy!

Why do you NOT do what you know is good for you?

Well, there might be several reasons. For starters, it’s easy to fall back into old habits. Change is hard, there’s no doubt about that. And change takes time, patience and perseverance. You can do it as long as life cooperates. But once life throws you a curve ball, you haven’t learned how to juggle that curve ball while maintaining your newfound healthy habits. So, you fall back into old familiar habits that feel safe, even if they aren’t healthy for you.

Now, don’t feel bad about this. It happens to the best of us. What you should feel bad about is if you don’t keep trying. If you just throw in the towel and say and do one of the two following statements:

“It doesn’t matter, I’m destined to be fat, and so I might as well just forget trying. I’m going to enjoy my food and I’ll show them (by the way, who is “them”)?”

“I’m going to try the Atkins diet again, or Weight Watchers for the umpteenth time”.

Now, let’s discuss each of the above statements.

In statement number one, you are engaging in pessimistic thinking (the cup is half empty). This type of self-talk is negative messaging that only leads to more unhappiness and self-destructive thoughts and behaviors.

In statement number two, you know full well that diets don’t work. I don’t care what diet it is. Diets just don’t work as a ‘forever’.

Again, you know this. So, why do you fall for the fad diet’s false advertising time and time again?

I am going to explain why in full detail AND I am going to give away my 5 Step System to Break Free of Dieting so you can get the body and life you love on my upcoming Free Online Webinar.

Here are the deets:

Monday May 16, 2016 at 8 pm EST/5 pm PST.

Join HERE.

This is a Pitch-Free Webinar. I am not selling any home study or group program.

In honor of my birthday month (May), I am giving back to you by teaching you my system at no cost to you.

There is no reason not to show up live.

Register here. I can’t wait to speak to you!

Doctors Who Just Don’t Understand Intuitive Eating

It seems that ever since I started teaching the process of intuitive eating to my clients, the terms “intuitive eating” and “mindful eating” are popping up everywhere on the internet. These are the new buzz words when it comes to people looking for a way to lose weight.

You might wonder why that bothers me. I’ll tell you why.

Intuitive eating is not about losing weight. It is not a weight loss program per-se. It is a process that helps you transform the way you look at food, think about food, and have food present in your life. Becoming an intuitive eater (or shall I say reclaiming your ability to be an intuitive eater since you were born one) is about you making peace with food so you can enjoy a diet-free life of guilt-free eating which in turn will help you achieve weight loss and a body you love.

Will you accomplish this in one or two months of intuitive eating work?

Absolutely NOT!

And anyone who expects that you will just does not understand what intuitive eating is or what the process entails. This is also probably someone who has never had a weight problem before and has always told you to “just stop eating what you shouldn’t eat”. Really, if only it were that easy.

This is also possibly your doctor who is so good at telling you that “you have to lose weight” but doesn’t give you any realistic coaching on how to do that. Or, worse yet, the doctor tells you to “avoid all bread and carbs to lose weight”.

Listen, there are many quick weight loss methods out there that you can follow to successfully lose weight. If your doctor is looking for the weight to come off in any way possible, then he will recommend these quick fix methods for you. You will lose the 50 or 100 pounds he is bothering you to lose. Great. But where will it leave you when one year later those pounds are back on plus another 30?

Do I sound frustrated? If I do, well that’s because I am. There are too many people out there in the world falling prey to the latest quick fix diets, and doctors who push their patients towards them for the quick weight loss are really doing a disservice to their patients. While they think they are doing a service, they are truly not!

The process of intuitive eating is not about disregarding what you are eating. I am not telling you that in intuitive eating, you should overfill your plate with pasta a la vodka, donuts or cookies.

While on the intuitive eating journey, you can still nourish your body with wholesome foods but the guilt of eating the piece of cake is gone. I actually encourage nourishing foods but you are the one who chooses it because you will find that as you learn to tune into and listen to your body, these are the foods that make you feel well, energized and healthy. You aren’t eating them because you are TOLD to eat them, and that is the big difference.

So, the next time someone says to you “you need quicker results”, tell them that statement is part of the diet mentality, and you are no longer dieting. Intuitive eating is a process and you will allow it to unfold naturally for you, whether that be 6 months, 9 months, or one year.

If you need help in getting started on your intuitive eating journey, request a free consultation here.

Is Intuitive Eating a Weight Loss Program or Not?

More often than not, people struggling to lose weight will say yes to a new diet that hits the market. Whether the catch phrase is diet, program, system or technique, if it is something they haven’t tried, you can bet they are going to get suckered into the claims that THIS is the diet, program, system or technique that will finally help you achieve the weight loss you pray for.

So when I was having a conversation the other day with a woman who was asking me about the intuitive eating work I do with my clients, I wasn’t surprised when she asked me about the “weight loss program” that she was interested in learning more about.

I quickly stated, “Intuitive eating is not a weight loss program”.

Whoa! Wait a minute! That stopped her dead in her tracks. Her mouth dropped open. “If it is not a weight loss program, then what is it”, she asked.

I proceeded to explain to her that the intuitive eating work I do with my clients is a step-by-step process to help them transform their relationship with food, where they end the battle with food and their body and achieve great pleasure in eating once again.

You see, all the years of dieting has caused food to be your enemy, and has led you to feel guilty after eating foods that you deemed “bad” by the diet industry. On top of that, each time you eat one of these bad foods, or you overeat and feel shame and guilt, you also feel miserable about yourself and your body.

Intuitive eating puts all things back into perspective. Intuitive eating reminds you that you are in charge of your food choices and your body. You have the inner wisdom to know when you are hungry and when you are full, when you should start eating and when you should stop.

The process of learning to become an intuitive eater puts you back into the driver’s seat of deciding what foods you want to eat, how you want to dress, and helps you to love and respect yourself, and your body again.

In turn, as you learn to live life as an intuitive eater with an inner love that shows kindness to yourself, gentleness with yourself and ultimately acceptance of yourself, something wonderful happens. You start to release weight! You start to feel your pants become loser, your stride become longer, your walking pace become quicker and your breathing become easier.

Yes, you will naturally lose weight, returning to what is a “natural, healthy weight” for your body, not an ideal weight based on a calculation and a chart.

So, is intuitive eating a weight loss program?

No, it is not.

Can you release weight when living life as an intuitive eater making conscious food choices?

Yes you can!

Sounds pretty darn good to me!

Your turn to take action: Contact me if you would like to get started on your intuitive eating journey. Just click here to learn more.

Why a Diet Food Delivery System is Making You Fatter

Breakfast Burrito, Chickpea Falafel, Shitake Glazed salmon with Basmati Brown Rice and Broccoli, Veggie Pizza….YUM!

These sound delicious, right? They are menu items I am reading off a menu that you can have delivered to your door daily for an exorbitant amount of money. But the money doesn’t deter you because this is a “diet food delivery system” that tells you exactly what to eat in the exact amounts to eat each and every day, several times per day. You have ZERO decisions to make about food.

Wow, sounds awesome!

Or, does it?

I’ll tell you, at a quick glance, sure who wouldn’t want cooked food delivered right to your doorstep which all you need to do is eat when it arrives. But let me ask you. For how long can you shell out the big bucks for this convenience? And, what happens when you want to live your life again by going out to dinner, meeting your friends for lunch, going to a party, wedding, or barbecue get-together. I could go on and on and mention all the social occasions that revolve around food, and you won’t know what to eat. Or, worse yet…

You will sit there and NOT eat and stick out like a sore thumb.
You will bring your boxed food, and again, stick out like a sore thumb.
Say, “the heck with it” and eat everything in sight because tomorrow you are going back to your delivered food. But in the meantime, you overeat, feel bloated, cranky, lethargic and guilty for having blown your diet once again

Let me ask you, why do you put yourself through this time and time again?

I know the answer. It’s easy to follow what someone gives you, or the foods someone else prepares for you.

It’s easy to not make any decisions about food.

But ultimately, this does not make you happy. This NEVER helps you reach your ultimate goal of a healthy body and a healthy life where food is just…dare I say…NORMAL!

Take a moment to digest what I am saying. I know that you are in agreement here. But I also know that you are afraid to let it go. It feels safe to you, and without it, you don’t trust yourself. This lack of trust comes from your years of dieting and following what others tell you to eat and do. If for just one moment, you can think back to your early childhood, before you had a weight problem, you trusted your body to tell you when you were hungry and when you were full. You can get back to that point. But you have to let go.

Let go of the diets, the boxed food, the food rules, the conditions you place on your food.

Open yourself up to learning to trust yourself. It will be a journey, that’s for sure. And, some days, that trust will be there more than on other days. But learn from it each and every step of the way. You can only do this if you are willing to stop obsessing about the scale right now. To stop obsessing about numbers, how much you lost, how much you gained. If you continue to watch the scale, you will continue to diet for many years to come.

But, and this is BIG…if you can trust yourself enough to put the scale away (hid it, throw it away, ask your partner to discard of it), then you are one step closer to reclaiming the trust in your body and to forever NEVER DIET AGAIN.

I am here to support you in whichever way you please. Just reach out and ask.

The Most Important Step in Losing Weight

I’m going to keep today’s blog short. It’s a quick message for you, although I realize it might not be so easy or quick for you to internalize.

I was asked a very interesting question yesterday. The question went like this:

“What is the most important thing I can do to lose weight besides changing my eating?”

I imagine what comes to your mind, besides food, would be….exercise. But that’s not what I answered her.

The very first and most important thing you need to do if you want to lose weight and never gain it back is to CHANGE YOUR MINDSET! That’s right. It has nothing to do with food.

You’ve tried changing your food and exercise before. You’ve been on multiple diets, on and off. You’ve gained weight, you’ve lost weight, and you’ve gained the weight back again.

You’ve exercised at the gym, at home, you’ve done boot camps, you hired a trainer, you tried Zumba and even spinning.

And, you are right back where you started from. Trying to lose the weight again.

This is because you have been starting at the end, not at the beginning. You have been so focused on what to eat, how much to eat, when to eat as dictated by the diet plans and what is “healthy”, that you aren’t understanding the big WHY– why you choose what you choose, when you choose it. You are stuck in a diet mentality and are afraid to let it go.

It is most important to start by changing your mindset around food, around dieting, around your body and your life. As a dieter, you must move past your dieting mentality and the idea that you need to deprive yourself and/or restrict yourself of your favorite foods in order to lose weight. You must move past the thought that you must “follow” what someone else tells you to eat because you no longer trust yourself to make those decisions.

The sooner you can do this, the sooner you can develop a healthier relationship with food and allow yourself to be guided by your inner body wisdom to know when to start eating and when to stop. However, if you say in the cycle of food worry, you will continue to think it’s the food that’s at the core of the problem, and that’s just not so.

There’s a lot more I can say on this topic. We are discussing it in our online private Facebook community.

Come and join the discussion.

Don’t allow a number (on a scale) to determine your self-worth

For many people, the scale has always been used as a measure of happiness. Whether you realize it or not, the number on the scale often influences your mood and subsequent decisions each day.

The scale is one of the biggest threats to anyone trying to make peace with food and to find comfort with their own body. If you weigh yourself on the scale to see your weight loss progress, you probably connect the number shown to a value of your self-worth. And you likely have expectations of what the number on the scale means.

What am I referring to? Let’s say you really commit to making mindful, healthy choices all week and at the end of the week, you hop on the scale all excited to see a loss but instead you see your weight hasn’t changed much. It will be easy for you to say “I did all the work and for what?”

Or maybe you had a very “lax” week and you had a few late night food binges or ate past the point of comfort and when you weighed yourself that week, you lost weight! Maybe you will think “why try so hard if I can lose weight eating chocolate cake with each meal!”

Weighing yourself on the bathroom scale is a sure way to undermine all your efforts and hard work. The scale is tricky. You may not see your weight dropping as much or as quickly as you hoped for. You may feel discouraged and want to give up on your efforts or you may feel inclined to switch to extreme weight loss measures for fast gratification.

However, if you would like to make meaningful changes to improve yourself and your life, LISTEN UP! It’s time to put the scale to rest.

The scale measures your total body weight and the number can fluctuate based on hormones, when you last ate, and more. If you are relying on the scale to report to you how you are “doing” on your eating plan, you will likely be disappointed if you don’t take these other variables into consideration.

If you want to experience true results, stopping watching the scale and start listening to your BODY. That’s where the true AHA moments happen.

Do you have a “goal weight” hovering in the back of your mind? Forget about it. Shift your focus away from the number to how you FEEL and how well you are LISTENING to your body.

If you need some help with this try to focus on some of the following instead of focusing on the scale:

How do you feel when you engage in exercise each day?
Did you only decide to eat when you were physically hungry? Did you stop when you felt comfortably satisfied?
How is your energy and stamina? Your mood?
Are you comfortable and confident in your own body today?

Your turn to take action: Put away the scale and commit to not weighing yourself for one month. Focus on listening to your body and let me know how you feel.

Tag Archive for: weight loss