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Why I Wrote My Book, Enjoying Food Peace (Coming Soon)

For years I’ve been helping clients and patients make the changes necessary to live a healthier life. I’ve enjoyed every minute of it, it’s an amazing feeling to hear from a client how I’ve impacted them in a positive way.

 

Yes, I make a difference and I help people. Man, this feels good.

 

But one day it occurred to me. While many of my clients were making lifelong changes, there was a group of individuals who were struggling. After digging deeper, I realized why.

 

These wonderful and caring individuals were not at peace with food or their bodies. They were striving to live up to society’s standards of the “thin ideal” and would do anything to achieve this unreasonable goal, all the while being miserable. They were eating foods that they thought they should eat, and not foods they loved. And, if they ate something they loved, they often felt guilty afterwards telling themselves “now I’m going to gain weight.”

 

If you’re here reading my blog, I imagine you resonate with what I’m talking about. Food is not something to be feared, food is to be enjoyed. Yet, too many people in this world are brainwashed to believe that there are “good-for-you” foods and “bad-for-you” foods and it wreaks havoc on their lives.

 

Labeling Food

Good/bad, healthy/unhealthy, legal/illegal etc. It doesn’t matter what label you give food, just the fact that you put a label on a food is elevating some foods and demonizing others.

 

Of course, there are some foods that are more nutrient-rich than others, I don’t argue that. But there is a purpose for all foods. Some foods fuel you and some foods give you great taste pleasure. And there’s nothing wrong with that.

 

Making Peace with Food

I’ve been in private practice for over 30 years! I’ve seen a lot of people lose weight and regain that weight plus more through some form of dieting. It was time for them to stop relying on what others told them to eat and start to eat what they truly wanted.

 

So, for the last 8 years I’ve helped chronic dieters and emotional eaters make peace with food through my Intuitive Eating Program. Once the food fear was gone, they were able to enjoy all types of foods made in all types of ways from all types of cuisine. They truly recaptured the pleasures of eating.

 

Enjoying Food Peace Was Born

I wanted this peace for people all over the world that were struggling with their food. So, I decided to write a cookbook called, Enjoying Food Peace: Recipes and Intuitive Eating Wisdom to Nourish Your Body and Mind.

 

Get a sneak peek here!

 

This book is not just for chronic dieters looking for food peace. It’s also for people who are obsessed with “eating healthy” to the point where they have cut out major food groups or nutrients and have just a small selection of foods they feel safe eating. It’s a segue back to balanced eating.

 

Enjoying Food Peace is also for everyone who enjoys a good meal.

 

It’s taken me 6 years to write this book! I put together an amazing team of nutrition interns who helped test the recipes. We met every Tuesday in my test kitchen to taste the foods that were prepared that week. Then we would evaluate and critique. “It needs a little more of that, a little less of this, ah, it’s perfect!”

 

The Wisdoms

After completing the recipes and putting together the book, I felt I wanted to add more. One night it came to me…write a chapter introducing intuitive eating and share some “Intuitive Eating Wisdoms” throughout the book. So, that’s exactly what I did! Not only will the recipes nourish your body, but the wisdoms will nourish your mind.

 

The creative genius and photographer behind the design of the book and the color photos you’ll see inside is my amazing assistant Samantha Baturin. This book would not be coming to life if it wasn’t for Samantha! I am forever grateful to her!!

 

Enjoying Food Peace provides the reader with over 150 tasty recipes and Intuitive Eating Wisdom to eat what you love, without a side of guilt.

 

I hope you’re as excited as I am for March 20th launch day! Keep your eyes peeled so you can get your copy!

 

In the meantime, here’s a sneak peek at what’s inside Enjoying Food Peace (free recipe included!).

 

 

Results Not Typical

It’s easy to be influenced by pictures we see or advertisements we read. There is no shortage of ads for weight loss products, pills, drinks, diets etc. Each of these are accompanied by a before and after picture. The before picture of the woman (or man) is usually her standing slouched over with a solemn look on her face. And then the after picture, standing with the best posture and a big smile. Many times, the person in the after picture is even holding up a large article of clothing to show the size they used to wear.

 

The advertisement is telling you that if you use said product, you can lose weight too, just like the person in the picture. It gets you all hyped up to think “If she can do this, so could I”. THIS is the solution (a.k.a. miracle) I’ve been waiting for!

The Problem

You may wonder what’s the problem with being encouraged by someone else’s weight loss results who used the advertised product?

 

The first problem (among many) is that all people are different. You don’t know what her medical history is or her dieting history. You don’t know what medications she’s taking that possibly affect her appetite or her weight. You don’t know anything about her except that she took this product and lost weight.

 

The second product is you know nothing about the ingredients in this product. Many times, you can’t even pronounce them. Will they interact with your meds? Are they approved ingredients? Is this product contraindicated with your conditions? Oh, there are so many unknowns here.

 

The Deceit

Did you ever look at the fine print in the advertisements? If not, take a look. It reads something along the lines of:

  • Results not typical
  • As part of a balanced diet and healthy lifestyle
  • All subjects followed a calorie-reduced diet and walking program
  • Price does not include cost of grocery items

 

Yes, you read that correctly. The models in the advertisements who used the product were also dieting, cutting calories and exercising. Yet, the ad doesn’t lead you to believe that. It makes you think that you just need to pop this pill (“supplement”) three times per day and voila!

 

And, the results you are seeing are not typical of most average people. The advertisers are saying it right there to you. But if you don’t read the fine print, you miss it. You think it’s the product that brought these results that you too desire so much.

 

Bottom Line

Don’t believe everything you see or read. And, do your due diligence, read the fine print. Don’t get suckered into another diet or gimmick. More than 95% of people who lose weight on a diet regain that weight within 2-5 years. Do you want to be included in that statistic?

 

The #1 Thing You Need to Do

Give up dieting. Commit to never diet again. But don’t stop there. Believe that you CAN change the way you relate to food and your body. Your mind is a powerful thing. It all starts with ONE BELIEF!

 

Not sure about intuitive eating?

Let’s take it one step at a time. First step is to break the spell that diets have over you. Add your name and email in the boxes below and join me over the next 3 days to learn how to break this spell.

Is Drinking 8 Glasses of Water a Diet Rule?

If you’ve been trying to lose weight, you’ve probably come across the recommendation to drink 8 glasses of water a day, right? This magic number 8 is supposed to help you lose weight. It’s part of the diet guidelines, along with eating “this and not that”, and of course starting an exercise program.

 

Water is an essential nutrient, one that many people don’t get enough of. Your body is made up of 60-70% water, so it would make sense that you would need to hydrate properly to replace fluids lost throughout the day (sweating, peeing, breathing etc.).

 

The Role of Water in Your Body

Water is responsible for such things such as:

  • Helping every cell, tissue and organ in your body function properly
  • Maintain bodily temperature
  • Remove waste
  • Lubricate joints
  • Improve digestion
  • Prevent constipation

 

Another Diet Industry Hijack

The problem is that the diet industry has co-opted the recommendation for drinking water. So, if you’ve been a chronic dieter who has finally said NO MORE DIETING, you may find yourself dehydrated most of the time.

 

This came to my attention as I was speaking with a client who I’m working with in my Intuitive Eating for Adults Program (let’s call her Terry). Terry has come so far in her journey towards making peace with food and her body. She is regularly listening to and honoring her inner signals of hunger and satiety and is making great strides in healing her body image. Yet one thing stood out to me last week when we met. She was complaining of feeling sluggish, tired all the time, and very fatigued.

 

When I asked her about her fluid intake, she said she doesn’t drink much. When we dug a little deeper, we uncovered the fact that she associates drinking water with dieting. And, she has a disdain for dieting at this point and wants nothing to do with anything that reminds her of dieting. And that incudes drinking water.

 

When Terry realized this, she had a big aha moment. She realized that she is in fact hurting her body by not hydrating it throughout the day. We worked on decoupling water drinking from dieting and reframing her beliefs. She just emailed me to say that this realization has made such a difference in her energy level. Now that she views water differently, she is hydrating each day and gets a lot more done.

 

My Question to You

 Do you associate drinking 8 glasses of water with dieting? Is this dieting thought preventing you from properly hydrating your body and being the best you can be? Let me know in the comments below!

 

Haven’t broken the spell of diets and diet rules yet? Join the free Break the Spell of Diets Experience – enter your name and email below!

3 Steps to Managing Diabetes WITHOUT a Focus on Weight Loss

Sue walked into my office with tears in her eyes. She sat down and burst out crying. I gave her a minute, then asked her what was wrong.

 

“I have diabetes!”

 

She then burst into tears, again.

 

I walked over to her, put my hands around her shoulders and gave her a gentle hug. This was what she was fearing for a long time. She knew she had pre-diabetes for 5 years, but she just didn’t believe she would ever develop diabetes. She never had any symptoms, so the pre-diabetes diagnosis just never seemed real.

 

Sue’s doctor “warned” her time and time again that if she doesn’t lose weight, her pre-diabetes will become full blown diabetes. And that it had. However, it’s not as if Sue didn’t try to lose weight. She did, MANY times. And you know what? Sometimes she “succeeded” in losing weight, but the problem is she gained that weight back plus more, ALWAYS.

 

So, when Sue’s doctor gave her the news that she has diabetes, she felt beaten. He once again prescribed “weight loss”. She sat in my office and said “there has to be another way to manage my diabetes besides weight loss. Like there must be some other things I can do to help myself, because diets just have never worked.”

 

Bright woman! Yes, there are plenty of things to do to manage your diabetes without pursuing weight loss. It’s unfortunate that the majority of doctors go right for the jugular >> “you’re fat and have to lose weight”.

 

This happens for other medical diagnoses as well. High blood pressure, heart disease and high cholesterol, to name a few. Docs go right to the scale!

 

So how do you manage diabetes, or any of the medical conditions I mentioned above, without focusing on dieting and losing weight?

 

By using a weight-neutral approach to treatment.

 

Weight-Neutral Interventions

 

Weight-neutral interventions are based on the fundamental idea that a person’s health status or risk cannot be assumed based solely on a number on a scale. There are many factors that go into a person’s body weight including genetic, metabolic, physiological, cultural, social and behavioral factors.

 

Weight-neutral treatment programs focus on habit and lifestyle behaviors, rather than on weight, BMI and the pursuit of weight loss.

 

Getting back to Sue, I started working with her to help her learn about her diabetes, what is going on in her body and how adopting new habits and behaviors can help avoid diabetes complications now and later in life.

 

3 Steps to Better Blood Glucose Control without Dieting

  1. Start testing your blood glucose daily. Ideally, you will test upon awakening (fasting blood glucose), and 2 hours after a meal (for type 2 diabetes).

 

  1. Write down what you eat for each meal and start to look for trends. Meaning, are your blood sugars always high before dinner? Do you tend to have low blood sugar readings mid-morning? This is data that you will use to make changes to your diabetes meal plan.

 

  1. Find a doctor who practices from a HAES (Health at Every Size) approach. Advocate for yourself and ask for the treatment they would give to a person in a smaller body.

 

For more information on how you can manage your diabetes without dieting, click HERE!

 

Whether you have diabetes or another medical condition such as high cholesterol, pursuing weight loss is NOT the best treatment prescription. I know this is different than you’ve been told for years, but where has this led you? Let me know if you want to chat about it. Click HERE to get in touch.

I Ate a Cinnamon Bun (and an Egg Roll)

Vacations are wonderful. At least now they are since I’m no longer dieting. In my dieting days, it would be very difficult to find a restaurant to go to for dinner that had food options on the menu that I “can” eat. I was so very careful of everything I put into my mouth, and honestly, I can say now that I was a party pooper back then.

 

This vacation was different. I just returned from a week in Florida where my husband, daughter and I went to visit my parents. We spent a few days at Hutchinson Island in Jensen Beach. It was so nice. The first night we were there, my parents wanted to take us out to dinner. Everyone voted on Chinese food. I don’t usually eat Chinese food, mainly because of the sodium content, I just find the food too salty. But I agreed to go.

 

Chinese Dinner

As I was looking over the menu, I took my time to see what I wanted to eat, versus what I “should” eat. I decided on a Tofu with Chinese Vegetables dish. And, because we went for the early bird (before 5:30 pm!), every dinner included a vegetable egg roll. Now, let me share 2 things with you. First, if I ever did order Chinese food in the past (which was rare), I would order it with a white sauce on the side. Second, I would NEVER eat an egg roll. I can’t even remember the last time I did.

 

My meal came (see pic below). It was delicious! And, yes, I ate most of the egg roll too! I stopped eating when I was comfortably satisfied and took the remaining portion home. When I left the restaurant, I felt satisfied and happy that I was open to eating Chinese food.

 

 

Pastry Shop

During the week, my husband and I went to Wynwood Walls in Miami. Have you ever been there? It’s a cool place to visit! Anyway, there’s a great food place there that we were told we just “had” to eat at. They are famous for their pastries, so as part of our meal, we ordered a cinnamon bun and almond pastry to share. Again, I stayed mindful during my meal, and enjoyed every bite. Later that night, I said to my husband “aren’t I more fun now that I eat all foods?” Without hesitating, he said YES!

 

Releasing Food Fear

What about you? If you are still dieting or you haven’t yet rebuilt the trust in your body and your ability to make food choices, do you find that this affects your relationships? Comment below!

 

More often than not, when you experience food fear, it prevents you from living your best life. You miss out on social opportunities and it may even be the cause of a relationship breakup.

 

I am so happy that I am free to eat what I desire, without guilt and without any worry of overeating. I’d love for you to experience this as well.

 

Getting Started

How do you start? By joining the free Break the Spell of Diets in 3 Days Experience. Just enter your name and email below to get started now.

 

If you’d like to view my intuitive eating course offerings, click here.

 

 

 

 

Blame the Diet Industry NOT Yourself

Did you know that Americans spend more than $60 billion dollars annually to try and lose weight?

 

Let that sink in for a moment.

 

That number includes weight loss programs and money spent on diet foods and beverages.

 

That’s a lot of money to spend blaming yourself when the “product” you are buying doesn’t work. Right, that’s what you do? You blame yourself when you can’t follow the diet or you don’t lose weight despite following the diet.

 

The Source of the Blame

 

Think about it.

 

If you purchased a new iPad, and it didn’t work, you’d complain to Apple about the device being defective.

 

If you bought a wall clock at Target and it stopped working, you’d return it telling them it was a cheap clock.

 

If you were working on a home improvement project and the drill stopped working, you’d blame the manufacturer for a faulty drill.

 

But when it comes to the diets you’ve tried, and the weight you regained (plus some) you don’t blame the diet company, you blame yourself.

 

What’s Wrong with Me?

 

Once off your diet, you start to say to yourself “I didn’t follow the rules correctly”, “There’s something wrong with me, I need to try harder” or “I’ll never get this right.”

 

I’m not going to name diets, it doesn’t matter which ones. The diet industry is brilliant, really, they are. They have set themselves up to be the winner over and over again. They’ve created this cycle of dieting that has led you to keep coming back.

 

Play it Out

 

Here’s what happens.

 

Desire/Action:  You want to lose weight, you go on XYZ diet.

Feeling: Excited

Result: You lose weight and meet your goal.

Feeling: Yay, celebration!

 

6 months later, you’ve regained the weight, plus more. 

 

Feeling: Disappointment

Result: You spend a few weeks or months feeling sad, ashamed and berating yourself.

 

Desire/Action: You want to lose weight. You go back on XYZ diet.

Feeling: Excited

Result: You lose weight and meet your goal.

Feeling: Yay, celebration!

 

3 months later, you’ve regained the weight, plus more.

 

Feeling: Disappointment

Result: You spend a few weeks or months feeling sad, ashamed and berating yourself.

 

Desire/Action: You want to lose weight. You go back on XYZ diet.

Feeling: Excited

 

AND ON AND ON IT GOES!

 

How many times do you think you have repeated the above sequence of events?

 

If you are being true to yourself, then most likely you have tried a particular diet more than once.

 

Why is that?

 

Because the diet industry has set it up that they are the winner when you lose the weight.

 

And, they are there to pick you up when you fall and gain the weight back.

 

I want you to listen up, because this is not normal! Stop blaming yourself, you are NOT TO BLAME.

 

The diet industry is the ONLY industry where the product user blames themselves. Shame on you diet industry for making so many people feel so badly about themselves.

 

If you are reading this, please know that you are not alone in trying to break free of the diets and the manipulations. You have it within yourself to trust your body to make the decisions around what to eat and when to eat! Speak back to the diets you’ve been on. No, actually, YELL at them. Show them that you are on to them and their deceit. You don’t need them anymore.

 

Once you’ve made the decision to fight back against the diet industry, you will feel a weight lifted from your shoulders and you will be empowered to take the next step towards reclaiming your birthright – body trust and being an intuitive eater.

 

If you’re looking for help breaking away from the dieting industry, head over to TalkWithBonnie and let’s set up a time to talk! I’m here to help you.

 

Intuitive Eating is Not Giving Up

What feeling comes to mind when you decide to never diet again? For many people, an immediate “weight” (no pun intended) is lifted off their shoulders. They use words such as:

 

Freedom

Excitement

Exhilaration

Relief

Joy

 

(What’s your word, comment below!)

 

But for others, I know this isn’t the case. When you’re in the contemplation stage of thinking about no longer dieting and instead to “try” intuitive eating, you have a feeling as if you are “giving up”.

 

But why is that?

 

Diets don’t work. I’m not just talking about the formalized diets like Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, Nutrisystem, Slim Fast etc. I’m also talking about your own self-designed diets. You know the ones where you make a set of rules for yourself, the “do’s and don’ts” of eating and you follow those rules. This doesn’t work either. And when I say “work”, I’m speaking your language because you determine success by a number on the scale.

 

Sure, when you restrict your eating for a period of time and you exercise your buns off, you will likely lose weight. But you and I know that that weight does not stay off. When you start to feel deprived of not eating the foods you love, and when you get tired of killing yourself at the gym, you give up these set of rules and the weight returns.

 

That is, until you get fed up with yourself and you are disgusted with your body and how you feel, well, then you write up another set of rules to follow for the next few weeks.

 

And on and on you go.

 

I think that you realize it’s time to change. It’s time to finally say no more dieting. But you feel that if you don’t at least “try” to “control” your weight, then it’s like giving up. You feel that if you embrace the intuitive eating journey and don’t focus on your weight, then you are giving up. That if you don’t try to lose weight, then you’ve given up.

 

Committing to the intuitive eating journey is NOT you giving up. It is you showing respect to your body and telling yourself that you are worth more than the food obsession that’s become the sole purpose of your every day.

 

I am not telling you to eat a dozen donuts for breakfast every morning (but if you want a donut, heck go ahead and enjoy it!). What I am telling you is that intuitive eating is not dieting. Don’t let your past dieting “failures” lead you to think that you will “fail” at intuitive eating too.

 

First, there is no failure in intuitive eating. It’s just not possible.

 

Second, intuitive eating is you giving yourself a chance to finally be a peace with food and your body and come home to the body that you were born in.

 

So on the contrary, intuitive eating is not giving up. It’s giving you the gift of life.

 

If you’re ready to give it a go, learn more about my Intuitive Eating for Adults Programs HERE. If you’d like to get started either working 1-1 with me, or you prefer the online program, just reach out to me.

 

Isn’t it time?

 

3 Ways to Push Past Fear (So it No Longer Holds You Back)

Fear is a paralyzing feeling. It keeps you from trying new experiences, making change and truly living a fulfilling life.

 

Fear is real. Nobody should make you feel “less than” for having fear. On the contrary, if someone really cares about you, they should help you overcome your fear.

 

In my world of working with chronic dieters and emotional eaters, the two big fears I hear almost daily is giving up the food rules and the fear of failing at intuitive eating.

 

No More Food Rules?

Giving up dieting means that you no longer follow external rules of “eat this, not that, in this way, at this time”. Yikes, that’s a scary thought. For decades you’ve been following the rules of what and how to eat by some arbitrary source other than yourself. So the thought of not having this direction is scary.

 

“How will I know what to eat?”

“How will I know when to eat?”

“How will I know how much to eat?”

 

Great questions! You will instinctively know the answer to each of these questions once you learn to listen to your innate body wisdom. This will take time. But it is possible.

 

Fear of Failing

The fear of failing is real. I know it. You’ve been on countless diets and while you may have had some success, as measured only by weight loss, that success was short-lived. Yet, you repeated the cycle over and over again, and each time, you considered yourself a failure.

 

Who wants to experience failure?

 

No one!

 

Well, the beautiful part of intuitive eating is there’s no failure in intuitive eating. You are not on or off anything, so there’s no falling “off track” or “off the wagon”. There are no rules for you to feel like you are “breaking”. What you once thought of as a slip up is truly an opportunity of growth and moving forward.

 

Intuitive eating is a whole new way of looking at your relationship with food. I promise you, if you are willing to do the work, then you will not fail.

 

Food is meant to bring you pleasure, not torture. Don’t let fear hold you back.

 

3 Ways to Push Past the Fear

  1. Take a leap of faith. While the unknown is scary, it can also be exciting. Remind yourself that what you’ve been doing over and over again has not brought you the peace you want. But maybe, just maybe, it is within reach if you just take that leap of faith.

 

  1. Believe in yourself. You have been put on this earth for a purpose. Your food and body worry has taken up so much brain space and time that it is preventing you from living your purpose. Believe that you are capable of change and change will come.

 

  1. Just decide its time. Let this moment be the moment that you decide that its time to stop struggling. You’ve had enough, your done, and you are ready for the next chapter. Making a decision is powerful. Once you do it, the fear lifts up and floats away.

 

 Isn’t it time for you to put your fear behind you?

 

I vote yes. And I’m here to help you!

 

5 Steps to a Diet-Free Commitment this Year

Happy New Year! I’m excited that it’s a new year…there is so much that I want to do in 2019. First and foremost, on the TOP of my list is to spend more time with my kids and grandchildren. Every time I see my yummy grandsons (Evan, 5 years old and Zach, 3 years old), my heart lights up!

 

In truth, I don’t get to see them as often as I’d like mostly due to my and my husband’s work schedules, and the work schedules of my son and daughter-in-law. And, it doesn’t help that they, and my other married son live across 2 bridges. But I always say that we have to count our blessings and I am thankful that I don’t have to get on a plane to see them!

 

 

Sometimes there are barriers to achieving the things we really want in life. If we let those barriers hold us back, then we will rarely achieve our goals. It’s important to do what is within our power to make happen what we want to happen.

 

The Number One Barrier to a Healthy Relationship with Food and Your Body

 

Right now, during the first week of January, the number one barrier to you creating a healthy relationship with food and your body is the slew of dieting ads and commercials that promise you the weight loss you so desire.

 

You may not see it this way. Perhaps you are reading these ads and thinking “this will be the diet that works for me.” And just like that, you hold yourself back from finally finding freedom from the battle with food and your body that you’ve been living with for years.

 

Busting through the Diet Temptation Barrier

 

I promise you that dieting is not going to bring you any peace in your life. All that dieting will do is keep you on the roller coaster of restriction – binge eating – guilt – shame.

 

If dieting was the answer, it would have “worked” a long time ago.

 

So, how do you bust through this temptation to do “just one more diet”?

 

First and foremost, I want you to know that I understand the temptation to try that one last diet. I’ve been there before, so I really do get it. Here are 5 steps to help you commit to being diet-free in 2019!

 

  1. Take a few minutes tonight and sit with yourself quietly. Be sure that you are relaxed, not hungry, and tell your family that you don’t want to be interrupted for at least 30 minutes. You’ll need to have a pad and pen handy.

 

  1. Close your eyes, take a deep breath and ask yourself the following questions:
  • What has been the emotional cost of all my years of dieting? (examples – depression, anxiety, poor body image etc.)
  • What has been the relationship cost of all my years of dieting? (examples – lost friendships, broken relationships, social anxiety etc.)
  • What has been the health cost of all my years of dieting? (Example – blood sugar swings, elevated blood pressure, hair falling out, menstrual irregularities, GI trouble etc.)

 

After each question, open your eyes and begin writing. Don’t edit your words, just write.

 

  1. Read your responses to each question OUT LOUD (this part is really crucial), and now ask yourself this last MOST IMPORTANT question:

 

If I don’t break this chronic dieting pattern, how will that affect my future and that of my daughters (and sons) who are watching me and learning from me?

 

  1. Declare “I am committed to never dieting again!”.

 

  1. Click HERE to schedule a quick complementary call with me to get started on your intuitive eating journey in 2019!

 

You don’t need to walk this journey alone, nor should you. We all need support along the way. I’m here for you if you are ready. Are you ready? Let me know in the comments below!

Can You Fail at Intuitive Eating?

The short answer is no! You cannot fail at intuitive eating. But let’s dig into this topic a bit because the idea of failure is top of mind for chronic dieters.

 

You’ve been down this road before. You want to lose weight so the only way you know how to do that is to go on a diet. You’re going along fine, eating what the diet tells you to, not eating what you “shouldn’t” and you start to feel lighter on your feet. Your clothes are fitting better and you are on a high.

 

Until you aren’t anymore.

 

What happened?

 

Well, you had a bad day at work, you lost a client, your boss yelled at you, you got a ticket driving home, and you had a fight with your partner. You walk in the house and you are in a really foul mood. You head straight to the kitchen and open the fridge to grab that chocolate cake you knew was in there, leftover from the party the other night. You dig in, and you tune out.

 

When you come out of your chocolate cake coma, you are really upset with yourself. You just blew your diet. Now you feel frustrated, angry with yourself, and the negative self-talk begins: “There you go again, screwing it all up”, “You can never stay on a diet, why do you even try”, “You are such a failure”.

 

The above is just one scenario where your desire to be “thin” led you to a diet which led you to feeling like a failure. What are some other scenarios?

 

2 Other Scenarios that Lead to Feelings of Failure

 

  1. Scenario #1: You want to lose weight and be “thin”. You go on a diet, restricting and depriving yourself of your favorite foods. At some point, you can’t stand the deprivation anymore…you must have “just a little” chocolate. You eat a piece, then another, and then another. Now, it’s an all out binge, as you vow to start again tomorrow. What happened here is that the restriction led to cravings which led to bingeing. Now, you feel miserable again and you have a deep desire to lose weight, again. You start the cycle all over> diet>restriction>deprivation>cravings>rebound eating>binge eating. And the feeling you have = FAILURE.

 

  1. Scenario #2: It’s the holiday season, and you’ve dieted your way into that little black dress. You are going to kill it at the holiday parties and family get-togethers. You can’t wait to hear all the compliments about your weight loss and how great you look. But wow, you are surrounded by all these goodies that you haven’t eaten for so long. You tell yourself you are not going to eat anything you “shouldn’t”. But then the inevitable happens. You aren’t paying attention, there’s a little too much alcohol and before you know it, you’ve dipped into the appetizers and pastries. At this point you tell yourself “I deserve it, I’m going to enjoy the holidays and not worry about the food. I’ll get back on my diet on January 1st.” And on January 1st, you wake up and feel miserable . You’ve regained much of the weight you lost, that little black dress doesn’t fit so well anymore, and you feel like a FAILURE.

 

What do you do? See scenario #1 above.

 

A Better Option than Dieting

 

I have another option for you where you will NEVER feel like a failure. And that option is > Intuitive Eating.

 

Intuitive eating is eating based on your physiological need to eat, based on your hunger and fullness signals, and NOT based on situations you are in or emotions you are feeling.

 

Intuitive eating is returning to eating the way you were born.

 

Now, just because you were born an intuitive eater, does not mean the journey back to it is an easy one if you’ve been dieting for years. You see, while as a baby you didn’t give much thought to eating, it was something you just knew (i.e. hunger pangs, cry for food; full belly, push away), as a dieting adult, you haven’t been listening to these signals. You’ve been relying on outside influences to guide your eating.

 

One of the biggest challenges I see with women who are learning to return to being intuitive eaters is TRUST. They are afraid to trust that their bodies will guide them correctly.

 

Is this you too?

 

I get it! You have lost trust in your body and in yourself to make your own food decisions because of all the “failures” from dieting (see scenarios above).

 

So, it’s of utmost importance that you understand that there is no pass or fail in intuitive eating.

 

Read and internalize this next sentence – I cannot fail at intuitive eating!

 

One of the biggest objections I hear from women who hesitate to commit to working on their relationship with food through intuitive eating is that they are afraid to fail again. That they’ve done it all and failed, so why should this work.

 

The reason? You have not tried this before. And if you have and you hit some roadblocks, then it’s more than likely that the diet mentality is still lingering. This is NOT FAILURE. This is part of the process.

 

A New Year Decision

 

Take this moment to commit to your intuitive eating journey. Repeat over and over “I cannot fail at intuitive eating” so a new neural pathway forms. Let this next year be the year where you leave dieting and all the negativity that comes with it behind.

 

I am taking new clients now for 2019. If you’d like to speak with me to see if we are a right fit for working together, just click here.