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3 Ways to Push Past Fear (So it No Longer Holds You Back)

Fear is a paralyzing feeling. It keeps you from trying new experiences, making change and truly living a fulfilling life.

 

Fear is real. Nobody should make you feel “less than” for having fear. On the contrary, if someone really cares about you, they should help you overcome your fear.

 

In my world of working with chronic dieters and emotional eaters, the two big fears I hear almost daily is giving up the food rules and the fear of failing at intuitive eating.

 

No More Food Rules?

Giving up dieting means that you no longer follow external rules of “eat this, not that, in this way, at this time”. Yikes, that’s a scary thought. For decades you’ve been following the rules of what and how to eat by some arbitrary source other than yourself. So the thought of not having this direction is scary.

 

“How will I know what to eat?”

“How will I know when to eat?”

“How will I know how much to eat?”

 

Great questions! You will instinctively know the answer to each of these questions once you learn to listen to your innate body wisdom. This will take time. But it is possible.

 

Fear of Failing

The fear of failing is real. I know it. You’ve been on countless diets and while you may have had some success, as measured only by weight loss, that success was short-lived. Yet, you repeated the cycle over and over again, and each time, you considered yourself a failure.

 

Who wants to experience failure?

 

No one!

 

Well, the beautiful part of intuitive eating is there’s no failure in intuitive eating. You are not on or off anything, so there’s no falling “off track” or “off the wagon”. There are no rules for you to feel like you are “breaking”. What you once thought of as a slip up is truly an opportunity of growth and moving forward.

 

Intuitive eating is a whole new way of looking at your relationship with food. I promise you, if you are willing to do the work, then you will not fail.

 

Food is meant to bring you pleasure, not torture. Don’t let fear hold you back.

 

3 Ways to Push Past the Fear

  1. Take a leap of faith. While the unknown is scary, it can also be exciting. Remind yourself that what you’ve been doing over and over again has not brought you the peace you want. But maybe, just maybe, it is within reach if you just take that leap of faith.

 

  1. Believe in yourself. You have been put on this earth for a purpose. Your food and body worry has taken up so much brain space and time that it is preventing you from living your purpose. Believe that you are capable of change and change will come.

 

  1. Just decide its time. Let this moment be the moment that you decide that its time to stop struggling. You’ve had enough, your done, and you are ready for the next chapter. Making a decision is powerful. Once you do it, the fear lifts up and floats away.

 

 Isn’t it time for you to put your fear behind you?

 

I vote yes. And I’m here to help you!

 

Can I Fail on My Intuitive Eating Journey?

No failures in IEI was thinking about a conversation I had with a new client a few weeks ago. She was really fed up with dieting and was looking for a solution to help her finally be at peace with food and her body.  We talked about the process of intuitive eating and it resonated with her greatly, but she had one big fear:  would she fail at this process, like she failed at dieting?

 

Her fear of failure was initially holding her back from saying yes to embarking on the intuitive eating process.  So we talked about that fear and one of the things I helped her to understand is that you cannot fail at intuitive eating.

 

You see, dieting is something you go on and you go off. Dieting is what actually triggers overeating.  Dieting is what causes the feelings of failure.

 

With intuitive eating, there is no failure. Intuitive eating is this process where you’re learning to become an intuitive eater, which is an ability you are born with.  That ability is already within you.   Every step along the path, is a lesson learned.  Every experience you have will be another lesson learned.

 

So what you might have thought of as a “failure” or “setback” on your diet, is now going to be thought of as a lesson learned.  Its growth and progress.

 

If you can view the process of intuitive eating from this place, a place of growth, a place of learning new things and new experiences, it will help propel you forward towards reclaiming being an intuitive eater. Here you will realize that you will always learn something from the process and you will never fail.

 

Once my client realized that she is not embarking on another diet, she realized she cannot fail on this journey.  This process is not something that ends.  You learn to live as an intuitive eater, it’s a practice.

 

And so when there is no endpoint, there’s no failure and no fear that’s attached to that.

 

Once she was able to let go of that fear, she was able to say “YES, let’s do this.  Let’s go on this journey together so I can reclaim being an intuitive eater”. She’s on that journey now and really enjoying it.

 

I say the same to you.

 

There are lessons learned in every experience you have on this intuitive eating journey.

 

If you come upon an obstacle or you think you have fallen off the wagon, let’s change that thought process and just think of it as a lesson learned that’s given you growth so you can continue along your journey.

 

As always, if you need me, I am here.

 

 

The 3 Pieces of the Chronic Dieting Puzzle, Why it Doesn’t Work and the Puzzle that Does

Obedience, willpower, and failure are three connecting pieces to a chronic dieters puzzle. Once you have one set in stone, the other two follow. I call this a “puzzle” because as a chronic dieter you believe that you need all three pieces to feel good about yourself and to get to a satisfying weight.

 

What if I told you that this is not the case? What if I told you that these three components are actually lethal to your health, and cause you to get trapped in the dieting cycle over and over again?

 

Let’s start with “obedience”. Say for example you have a new pet (how about a dog) and you are training your dog. You teach the dog what he can and cannot do (a set of rules if you will) and when the dog is not obedient, you punish the dog for bad behavior. For example, you tell the dog he cannot enter the living room when you are not home. You arrive home and your couch is all chewed up. Now you punish the dog by putting up a gate at the living room entrance because the dog was not obedient, the dog was “a bad dog”.

 

Now relate this to yourself. You are following a particular diet this month which lists for you foods that you can and cannot eat.  You are following a list of rules with do’s and don’ts. Yet, you eat the very food you are told not to eat (let’s say, pizza) and you tell yourself you’ve been “bad”, you weren’t obedient to the rules. You vow never to do this again.  Guess what? That’s not going to happen. You will absolutely eat that pizza again at some point in time. No one or thing can tell you how you feel and what you should eat. You are the expert of your body! You should be responsible for when, what, and how much you eat. So, let’s forget about obedience.

 

The second piece of the chronic dieter’s puzzle is “willpower”. Let’s take the party scene for example. Whenever you go to a party do you find yourself staring at the dessert table, drooling over everything that you love but have vowed to never eat again? You keep telling yourself you don’t need all the calories, just have willpower. You try and walk away but end up overindulging because you have starved your body from those desserts for a few weeks or even longer. Willpower is not a component of intuitive eating. You have natural desires, we all do. And to try and will yourself away from them just ends in disaster. Forget the willpower and listen to your own body’s signals because that will bring you back to your natural instincts, which you have lost through the dieting schemes.

 

The final piece of the chronic dieter’s puzzle is “failure”. This is what you feel once obedience and willpower have once again failed you through this dieting process. So you in turn overindulge and gain back all the weight that you lost, and sometimes even more. Newsflash: you are not the one that failed; the diets are what have failed.

 

Should I say that again? You are not a failure, nor will you ever be with intuitive eating.

 

You need to start working on a NEW PUZZLE.

 

THE INTUITIVE EATING PUZZLE. There are only three pieces to this puzzle.

 

Puzzle piece #1:          A Healthy Non-Diet Mindsetweightlosspuzzleviolet

Puzzle piece #2:          Nutrition Education

Puzzle piece #3:          Caring Support

 

Does it sound difficult? Well, nothing in life comes easy. But it is truly your solution if you want to finally break free of the pain of dieting and achieve the body that you love.

 

Now it’s your turn to take action: Contact me for your FREE Break Free of Dieting Strategy Session so you can put your INTUITIVE EATING Puzzle together effortlessly.