Posts

End Your Struggle with Food and Dieting!

It’s interesting. Many people know their struggles in life, but choose not to do anything about it. I sometimes wonder why that is. Why would someone identify a challenge they are having in their life, but not want to do what they need to do to change it?

 

While I can be speaking about so many things right now, such as hating your job, a difficult marriage, a strained relationship with a parent or child, what I really want to address with you is your relationship with food and your body.

 

Is one of your biggest struggles in life food and eating?

 

Is one of your biggest struggles in life being unhappy with your body?

 

If you answered YES to the above questions, then are you struggling with dieting?

 

Most probably if you struggle with food, eating and your body image, then you are struggling with dieting. I can say this with certainty because you’ve been led to believe that in order to “fix” your eating and your body, you need to diet. You need to be told what to eat, when to eat, and how much to eat. Let someone else tell you all these things so you don’t have to make any decisions about food, and that’s how you will achieve the body you’ve always wanted.

 

Well, this is a lie.

 

And, I guess that you have realized this lie, but you are caught in the web of deceit in diet culture.

 

Diets are SO tempting. Heck, if someone told me I can lose 30 pounds in 30 days, I’d be suckered into trying that too. Except that I have broken out of the web of lies that diet culture has you believing. But I realize that it’s not so easy.

 

I also want to say that I know that some of you reading my blog have stopped dieting because you know that diets don’t work. But you are still spinning your wheels. That’s because diet culture is very sneaky. You THINK you’re no longer dieting, but you very well may be and not even know this.

 

Now, I am only bringing this to your attention because I want you to stop and ask yourself if you are ready to do what it takes to stop the diet madness. If you are ready to finally break the spell that diets have over you.

 

If so, then click below for an ONLINE EXPERIENCE that will get you started.

 

Yes, it’s free! But it doesn’t mean it’s easy. And that’s okay. Because if you are serious about finally ending the biggest struggle in your life > FOOD AND DIETING > then join this unique experience and participate to the fullest.

 

Click here if your biggest struggle in your life is food and dieting!

 

I hope to see you in the experience!

 

 

How Do I Learn to Trust Again?

It’s not easy. It’s just not easy to trust someone or something that has let you down time and time again.

 

You want to trust, you really do. But you can’t.

 

How do you regain that trust after you’ve been shamed, disappointed, and embarrassed – again!

 

I can be talking about anything here. It could be a relationship with a spouse, partner, friend, parent, teacher and so on.

 

But what I’m really talking about is … your body.

 

Countless women (and some men) have shared with me that they have lost the trust in their bodies to know what to eat, when to eat, and how much to eat. This is because for years, they have been following some sort of diet which dictates all things food. They no longer had to make any decisions when it came to what, how much and when to eat. They just followed the rules.

 

Is this you too? Have you been a dieter who was (or maybe still is) a good rule follower, eating what the plan tells you to eat? Even better, you loved when the food was delivered to your door step, no prep even required. Pop it in the oven and walla, dinner is served (and breakfast, lunch and snacks).

 

You may have realized by now that this just does not work. If you’ve started a diet in an effort to lose weight, and you followed the diet, you probably did lose weight. But that weight loss was short lived. You went off the diet, only to regain the weight back, plus more. So, you set out to find another diet and did it again. And again, and again, and again.

 

Each time you regained the weight, you felt shame and embarrassed. You blamed yourself. “What is wrong with me? Why can’t I just stick to this diet?” You are feeling shamed that you gained the weight back and shamed in front of your friends and family who now see that you gained the weight back. And you blame yourself and your body.

 

You might want to stop this cycle. If you’ve been reading my blogs for a while, you know that diets don’t work. You might even have contemplated contacting me to learn more about intuitive eating. But it’s scary not to diet anymore, even though the diets have failed you each and every time.

 

Left to your own devices, are you able to choose your own foods, know how much to eat, and when to eat?

 

I say YES! You probably don’t think so…at least not in this moment. This is because you don’t trust your body anymore.

 

Listen, that’s okay. For now. You will learn how to re-gain that trust in your body. I know you will. But there is one thing you must do first. And that is…

 

Be BRAVE!

 

And with this bravery, there are 3 decisions you must make.

  1. Decide that you WANT to learn to trust in your body and your food choices again.

 

  1. Decide that you will NOT CARE what others say to you about your decision to stop dieting.

 

  1. Decide that you BELIEVE that it is possible. What you believe, will happen.

 

Are you ready to be brave? Are you ready to learn to trust again? Contact me here!

 

Taking a Leap of Faith

When’s the last time you took a leap of faith?

 

I met with a new client last week. Let’s call her Lindsay.

 

Lindsay was referred to me by her friend’s husband, Bob. He had been a client of mine a few years ago, coming for medical nutrition therapy for diabetes management. While working with Bob on habit and behavior changes to better manage his blood glucose, he happened to lose weight. He referred Lindsay to me because she has been struggling with her weight for many years.

 

As a matter of fact, Lindsay has been dieting for 35 years. On and off diets, losing and gaining weight, and trying whatever she could to lose weight. When she heard that Bob lost weight working with me, she made an appointment. She felt THIS would be her answer.

 

I met with her and as soon as we started talking, it was apparent that her situation was very different than Bob’s. Bob didn’t come to see me with a focus on weight loss. His focus was on diabetes management, which we worked on with a weight neutral approach.

 

What does diabetes management from a ‘weight neutral’ approach mean?

 

It means encouraging individuals to engage in health promoting behaviors to manage their diabetes without focusing on weight and the number on the scale.

 

In Bob’s case, he happened to lose some weight in the process of taking care of himself and learning to manage his diabetes.

 

For Lindsay, it’s a whole different story. Lindsay does not have diabetes, or any medical conditions. She came to see me with one purpose in mind: weight loss.

 

When we started talking about Lindsay’s history with dieting, I helped her understand why a meal plan was not in her best interest. She knew in her heart of hearts that “following” a meal plan would become just like another diet, but she didn’t know another way.

 

Until I introduced her to INTUITIVE EATING!

 

Lindsay had never heard of intuitive eating before. She has been so immersed in diet culture that she never even considered that there was a way out. Lindsay thought she’d be dieting until the day she died.

 

Lindsay decided to take a leap of faith. As much as she said to me “Bonnie, I’m so scared”, she was ready to leave dieting behind. She just needed to know that I am here for her and will be here for her as she starts her journey back to the way she was born > an intuitive eater.

 

What about you? Are you scared to leave dieting behind? Let me know in the comments below.

 

 

How to Help Your Friends Who Can’t Stop Dieting

I received an email from a young woman (let’s call her Susan) this week who follows my work in intuitive eating. She was sharing with me how thankful she is that she never fell prey to the dieting gimmicks and fads that so many of her friends have, and still do. She is also thankful that I share so much with my community by way of blogs, videos, trainings, as it has helped her stay true to herself in trusting her body.

With her permission, I am sharing an excerpt from her email below.

________________

Growing up, I was never exposed to fad dieting at home. My mom had a great relationship with food and taught me how to live my life as an intuitive eater. This was especially helpful when I was in high school, and lunch periods were consumed by friends talking about which new diet they’re trying and how many pounds they were “supposed” to lose by the end of the week. Thankfully, I was rock solid in my beliefs and always brushed off the diet talk.

I was excited to start graduate school and be part of a program with many intelligent individuals and advance in my career. Yet, the dieting talk followed me here too!

“I wanna lose at least 2 pounds by Friday, think it’s possible? I didn’t bring any food for lunch so I’m hoping that’ll be at least one pound down today” read a text I received last Tuesday from a classmate. I thought being 25 years old and in a notorious graduate program, most people moved past the “dieting stage” and wouldn’t give into the pressure of restricting themselves. Apparently not.

I replied to the text and explained that restricting your intake of food will not cause you to lose weight. In fact, it will actually slow your metabolism down! Plus, starving yourself throughout the day will ultimately backfire when you get home and see the food that was prepared for dinner. You’ll be so famished that you’ll eat too much too fast, ignoring your inner body cues.

“Nah, I have a lot of self-control” was the reply. I shrugged and moved on, thinking “oh well”.

Fast forward a couple of hours, I received a text that read “Help! I inhaled my food and ate too fast. I was just starving! I’m in so much pain”.

I feel bad for my classmate. I really do. She has been on and off many diets in her life, and she’s only 25 years old! As you can see, I tried discussing intuitive eating with her, but she doesn’t understand it. She really believes that she needs to restrict her food and deny her hunger as the way to “change her body”. I texted her your website, DietFreeRadiantMe.com, and gently suggested she read some of your blogs and watch your videos. I hope she does.

Thank you for all you do, Bonnie.

________________________

Wow, emails like this pull at my heart strings for 2 reasons:

  1. My heart is warm and fuzzy that I have helped Susan stay true to herself and maintain the trust in her body and her food choices. The fact that I have put myself out there online and am able to reach people that I might not have been able to reach with my important message makes my heart sing.

 

  1. My heart aches for those who are still struggling with diets, still struggling with loving their bodies, and not yet trusting that if they listen to their body, it won’t let them down.

 

So, where do we go from here?

 

I will continue to put myself out there and continue to spread my message that no form of dieting is going to work for losing weight and keeping it off.

 

And as scary as it is to stop dieting, it’s time!

 

I encourage you to be brave and take the leap of faith. You don’t need to go it alone.

 

I’m here to support you every step of the way.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When Eating is a Non-Issue and Food Decisions Just Happen

When you want to get into a routine and build something new into your life, one way to do so is to schedule and plan.  As a chronic dieter, this was (or maybe still is) also true for you when it comes to eating for weight loss (a.k.a. dieting).

 

You schedule the number of meals you’ll eat that day based on when the plan tells you to, and you restructure your life around that plan.  You find that you’re constantly thinking about what you’re supposed to be eating next, will you be eating it “on time” and if you didn’t pack it with you, will you be able to find something comparable.  You find the only thing you are thinking about is food.

 

I want you to remember a time where you weren’t worrying about your weight or your food.  You lived your life and when you were hungry you ate, you stopped when you were full and you weren’t frantically wondering if a food fell into your plan if you wanted to have it.  For many of you trying to get back to this memory, it might take you all the way back to your childhood days—and that’s OK.

 

When you were younger and there’s less to worry about, that carefree attitude translated easier to food.  Eating was just something you did in between all the other fun things you did each day. And you enjoyed every bite you took.

 

This is intuitive eating at its finest….when

 

…..Eating is a Non-Issue and Food Decisions Just Happen

 

Now that you are older and have been influenced by the diet culture that surrounds you, well, it hasn’t been so easy for you to return to the way you were born.

 

I know you have this deep desire to become an intuitive eater again. I know this because I have spoken to hundreds of you wishing it were easier.  I know how easy it is to fall back into diet mentality, and I also know how important support is for you on this journey.

 

Free Training

Join me tomorrow, Thursday September 7 at 8 pm EST for a Facebook Live training where I will discuss how you can make intuitive eating second nature again.

 

I’m going live in my private Facebook group, so if you aren’t yet a member of our group, click here now to join us for free.

 

Here’s what you’ll learn during our Facebook Live training:

  • The #1 reason you struggle with implementing the intuitive eating principles
  • What it really takes to make intuitive eating a part of your being
  • How you can be at peace with food and yourself so you can enjoy life to the fullest

 

Oh, and if you are not on Facebook and want to watch the replay, just send me an email to Bonnie@DietFreeRadiantMe.com and I’ll send you the recording.

 

How to Break Through Your Limiting Beliefs Around Weight Loss

Roadblock breakthroughSomething is keeping you stuck. Something keeps you trying each new diet that hits the market even though you know by now that diets don’t work.

 

Okay, so when I say “diets don’t work”, let me clarify.

 

Diets DO work in the short term by helping you lose weight, but ultimately they FAIL in the long term because you gain that weight back, plus some! So why oh why do you keep trying to follow a diet? And let’s be real for a minute. When you visit a registered dietitian nutritionist and ask for a “meal plan”, that is just a nicer way to say diet. If you don’t understand what I mean, read my story here.

 

So, let’s understand a little about why you might be resistant to giving up dieting.

 

  • Perhaps you think that a diet is the only way to lose weight. (Wrong!)

 

  • Perhaps you are too scared to trust that you actually know how to eat if you would just listen to your body. (I get that this might be true, but I can help you learn to re-trust your body again!)

 

  • Perhaps you really don’t want to be successful in losing weight. (Bingo!)

 

Wait, what did I just say? You don’t really want to lose weight? That’s insane. Of course you do, that’s why you try diet after diet, right?

 

I want to focus on that third bullet point. Dig deep down and ask yourself if you really want to lose the weight forever. What are your fears around shedding the layers that are possibly protecting you? What do you need to be protected from?

 

Consider some of the following beliefs that you might be holding onto, and understand these are preventing you from moving forward on your journey towards a body you love.

 

Do you ever say any of the following?

 

“I’m destined to be fat.”

“I will gain the weight back so why bother.”

“I won’t be able to trust myself around food.”

“Losing weight and changing my habits is hard, I’ll never be able to do it.”

 

These are all beliefs that MUST be knocked down, smashed through and turned upside down or you will still stay stuck where you are forever!

 

Sit in a quiet room and think. Just think about these beliefs you have around losing weight and your body. Then commit to getting the support you need to change your thought patterns and your behaviors.

 

Listen, I know you want to do this yourself. I get it. It’s embarrassing to ask for support, so you think.

 

I’m here to tell you there’s nothing to be embarrassed about. Come join other women (and some men) who are on the journey towards breaking down these negative beliefs and who are now believing in themselves. Click here and join our community, for free.

 

And, if you’d like further individualized support, just fill out this request at www.TalkWithBonnie.com

 

 

 

 

 

Is Intuitive Eating just for Women? A True Father’s Day Gift!

Intuitive Eating is Not Just for Women! (1)I recently had a potential client express how he was stuck in the dieting mindset.  He had tried many diets before and has lost the weight and gained it right back.  He has feelings of failure and did not know how to break out of the cycle.  I suggested intuitive eating and how it can help him.  He realized that is exactly what he needs, but hesitated for two reasons:

 

Reason #1: He is so used to wanting and getting results quickly, that to engage in a “food behavior therapy-type” program wasn’t going to get him the instant results.

 

Reason #2: He thought this type of deep work was only for women, and what would people think if he embarked on this journey?

 

Well, after a few more minutes of conversation, he realized that reason #1 was exactly why he was speaking to me in the first place. Yes, all those diets gave him quick results, but those results never lasted. So, what good were they?

 

As for reason #2, I get it. Quite a few men think the path towards intuitive eating is more for women than men.

 

But listen up men! Intuitive eating is not just for women.  Men and women were both born intuitive eaters and the process to reclaim this is unisex and can benefit everyone.

 

The work I do with my clients in my 5 Step Intuitive Eating Program is a step-by-step process to help you transform your relationship with food, where you end the battle with food and your body and achieve great pleasure in eating once again.

 

If you are a man reading this blog, I’m sure you have your reasons as to why you assume this process is just for women.  Men don’t like to talk about their emotions, right?  May I ask you why?  Is it because of what society thinks? Is it just because men don’t “do emotions”?

 

Men – It is OK to talk about your emotions!  You are not alone.  Intuitive eating will show you and teach you how to cope with your emotions without food!

 

With intuitive eating, you’ll be able to enjoy eating your favorite foods without experiencing the guilt afterwards.  You’ll learn to accept your body, and with acceptance comes appreciation of your body.  From there, your mindset will change and you’ll be able to build a better relationship with food.  Your body will thank you.

 

What better time to take charge of your health and break free of the dieting mindset than around Father’s Day? 

 

Here are two steps you can take today to start the journey to become an intuitive eater:

 

  1. Commit to saying goodbye to the quick – fixes. Truly recognize this isn’t your long-term solution.

 

  1. Take advantage of my Father’s Day Gift to you – a Break Free of Dieting Strategy Session. During this session we will uncover the challenges that’s been holding you back from losing weight forever, and we will map out your intuitive eating path. Just click here to schedule your free session.

 

Happy Father’s Day!

 

 

5 Steps to STOP Dieting Once and For All

5 steps webinar graphic 1You know how to eat healthfully. You have heard it time and time again.

 

Eat whole foods, lean proteins, whole grains, plenty of fruits and veggies (the colors of the rainbow) and healthy fats. And, yes, avoid highly processed foods!

 

You don’t need a “Food Revolution” to tell you this! You know this already.

 

You actually have eaten like this. Then stopped eating like this. Then started eating like this again, then stopped again! Yikes, I’m getting dizzy!

 

Why do you NOT do what you know is good for you?

 

Well, there might be several reasons. For starters, it’s easy to fall back into old habits. Change is hard, there’s no doubt about that. And change takes time, patience and perseverance. You can do it as long as life cooperates. But once life throws you a curve ball, you haven’t learned how to juggle that curve ball while maintaining your newfound healthy habits. So, you fall back into old familiar habits that feel safe, even if they aren’t healthy for you.

 

Now, don’t feel bad about this. It happens to the best of us. What you should feel bad about is if you don’t keep trying. If you just throw in the towel and say and do one of the two following statements:

  • “It doesn’t matter, I’m destined to be fat, and so I might as well just forget trying. I’m going to enjoy my food and I’ll show them (by the way, who is “them”)?”

 

  • “I’m going to try the Atkins diet again, or Weight Watchers for the umpteenth time”.

 

Now, let’s discuss each of the above statements.

 

In statement number one, you are engaging in pessimistic thinking (the cup is half empty). This type of self-talk is negative messaging that only leads to more unhappiness and self-destructive thoughts and behaviors.

 

In statement number two, you know full well that diets don’t work. I don’t care what diet it is. Diets just don’t work as a ‘forever’.

 

Again, you know this. So, why do you fall for the fad diet’s false advertising time and time again?

 

I am going to explain why in full detail AND I am going to give away my 5 Step System to Break Free of Dieting so you can get the body and life you love on my upcoming Free Online Webinar.

 

Here are the deets:

 5 steps webinar graphic 1

Monday May 16, 2016 at 8 pm EST/5 pm PST.

 

Join HERE.

 

This is a Pitch-Free Webinar. I am not selling any home study or group program.

 

In honor of my birthday month (May), I am giving back to you by teaching you my system at no cost to you.

 

There is no reason not to show up live.

 

Register here. I can’t wait to speak to you!

 

 

Is Intuitive Eating a Weight Loss Program or Not?

Woman with question marksMore often than not, people struggling to lose weight will say yes to a new diet that hits the market. Whether the catch phrase is diet, program, system or technique, if it is something they haven’t tried, you can bet they are going to get suckered into the claims that THIS is the diet, program, system or technique that will finally help you achieve the weight loss you pray for.

 

So when I was having a conversation the other day with a woman who was asking me about the intuitive eating work I do with my clients, I wasn’t surprised when she asked me about the “weight loss program” that she was interested in learning more about.

 

I quickly stated, “Intuitive eating is not a weight loss program”.

 

Whoa! Wait a minute! That stopped her dead in her tracks. Her mouth dropped open. “If it is not a weight loss program, then what is it”, she asked.

 

I proceeded to explain to her that the intuitive eating work I do with my clients is a step-by-step process to help them transform their relationship with food, where they end the battle with food and their body and achieve great pleasure in eating once again.

 

You see, all the years of dieting has caused food to be your enemy, and has led you to feel guilty after eating foods that you deemed “bad” by the diet industry. On top of that, each time you eat one of these bad foods, or you overeat and feel shame and guilt, you also feel miserable about yourself and your body.

 

Intuitive eating puts all things back into perspective. Intuitive eating reminds you that you are in charge of your food choices and your body. You have the inner wisdom to know when you are hungry and when you are full, when you should start eating and when you should stop.

 

The process of learning to become an intuitive eater puts you back into the driver’s seat of deciding what foods you want to eat, how you want to dress, and helps you to love and respect yourself, and your body again.

 

In turn, as you learn to live life as an intuitive eater with an inner love that shows kindness to yourself, gentleness with yourself and ultimately acceptance of yourself, something wonderful happens. You start to release weight! You start to feel your pants become loser, your stride become longer, your walking pace become quicker and your breathing become easier.

 

Yes, you will naturally lose weight, returning to what is a “natural, healthy weight” for your body, not an ideal weight based on a calculation and a chart.

 

So, is intuitive eating a weight loss program?

 

No, it is not.

 

Can you release weight when living life as an intuitive eater making conscious food choices?

 

Yes you can!

 

Sounds pretty darn good to me!

 

Your turn to take action: Contact me if you would like to get started on your intuitive eating journey. Just click here to learn more.

 

Why a Diet Food Delivery System is Making You Fatter

Menu deliveryBreakfast Burrito, Chickpea Falafel, Shitake Glazed salmon with Basmati Brown Rice and Broccoli, Veggie Pizza….YUM!

 

These sound delicious, right? They are menu items I am reading off a menu that you can have delivered to your door daily for an exorbitant amount of money. But the money doesn’t deter you because this is a “diet food delivery system” that tells you exactly what to eat in the exact amounts to eat each and every day, several times per day. You have ZERO decisions to make about food.

 

Wow, sounds awesome!

 

Or, does it?

 

I’ll tell you, at a quick glance, sure who wouldn’t want cooked food delivered right to your doorstep which all you need to do is eat when it arrives. But let me ask you. For how long can you shell out the big bucks for this convenience? And, what happens when you want to live your life again by going out to dinner, meeting your friends for lunch, going to a party, wedding, or barbecue get-together. I could go on and on and mention all the social occasions that revolve around food, and you won’t know what to eat. Or, worse yet…

  1. You will sit there and NOT eat and stick out like a sore thumb.
  2. You will bring your boxed food, and again, stick out like a sore thumb.
  3. Say, “the heck with it” and eat everything in sight because tomorrow you are going back to your delivered food. But in the meantime, you overeat, feel bloated, cranky, lethargic and guilty for having blown your diet once again

 

Let me ask you, why do you put yourself through this time and time again?

 

I know the answer. It’s easy to follow what someone gives you, or the foods someone else prepares for you.

 

It’s easy to not make any decisions about food.

 

But ultimately, this does not make you happy. This NEVER helps you reach your ultimate goal of a healthy body and a healthy life where food is just…dare I say…NORMAL!

 

Take a moment to digest what I am saying. I know that you are in agreement here. But I also know that you are afraid to let it go. It feels safe to you, and without it, you don’t trust yourself. This lack of trust comes from your years of dieting and following what others tell you to eat and do. If for just one moment, you can think back to your early childhood, before you had a weight problem, you trusted your body to tell you when you were hungry and when you were full. You can get back to that point. But you have to let go.

 

Let go of the diets, the boxed food, the food rules, the conditions you place on your food.

 

Open yourself up to learning to trust yourself. It will be a journey, that’s for sure. And, some days, that trust will be there more than on other days. But learn from it each and every step of the way. You can only do this if you are willing to stop obsessing about the scale right now. To stop obsessing about numbers, how much you lost, how much you gained. If you continue to watch the scale, you will continue to diet for many years to come.

 

But, and this is BIG…if you can trust yourself enough to put the scale away (hid it, throw it away, ask your partner to discard of it), then you are one step closer to reclaiming the trust in your body and to forever NEVER DIET AGAIN.

 

I am here to support you in whichever way you please. Just reach out and ask.